Madie's Bear Tribe Journal

MLBC: Journal Entry 2- Video

2011-10-01T12:13:00.000-07:00

MLBC: Journal Entry 1- Video

2011-09-27T16:59:00.001-07:00

MLBC- Prologue- Video

2011-09-26T04:58:00.001-07:00

Welcome

2011-09-15T12:01:00.000-07:00

Welcome Podcast- this was recorded five years ago. The email at the end is no longer valid. my email is marshaloftis at g mail dot com

Begin reading the story at the Prologue

MLBC: Journal Entry 164

2005-05-22T23:25:00.000-07:00

Journal Entry 164- Podcast not available

Please excuse the crooked writing of this journal entry. It’s hard to write in a truck that consistently hits every pothole in the road. It was a lovely meal. Yates and I had a nice talk at dinner last night. He had a list of things we were going to do when we returned to Fort Shasta. It all sounded so wonderful. I made up my mind that I was going with him. I need stability and a life not so complicated. I can have that at Fort Shasta with Yates. There will be no more worrying about enemies taking over my home. I look forward to not having to make difficult complicated decisions of survival.

I packed my things and let my friends know I was leaving everyone except Tony. He was nowhere to be found. I wish I could have talked to him one more time. I left a letter on his bed in the basement. My heart hurts because I didn’t get to say goodbye to him. I hate saying goodbyes but it would have been nice if I could have said goodbye to his face and given him a hug.

I left a note with Lisa to give to Casey in case she returns to Bear Country with Aleece. Pete promised me they would elect a new tribe leader in a few days. I suggested he run for the position.

I think one of my longest goodbyes was to Joshua of the Spurs. He is a wonderful leader and a great friend. I have not known Joshua very long but he was always there when I needed to talk. He gave Yates and me a bottle of wine to take on our journey and wished us luck and happiness. I promised him I would send the occasional letter to let him know what I was doing. He said he would write in return.

Madie

*****************

this is the end of book 1

MLBC: Journal Entry 163

2005-05-21T04:52:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 163

The games we play. It rained just enough today to make the ground muddy in places and to make a game of touch football worth watching. General Yates and a few of his soldiers played against Tony, Pete, Jonas, Matt, Hemy, Hyatt, and Joshua. (I don’t play football but I watch). Marty and Victor were the referees. By the end of the game it was almost impossible to tell who was who. Not one person playing the game escaped being covered in mud from head to toe. I thought the whole purpose of playing flag football was so that no one gets tackled. I could be wrong because people were rolling in the mud on nearly every play. It was a close game and I am sure the rules were continuously being revised. Not one touchdown remained undisputed. The game continued until the players couldn’t pick themselves up out of the mud anymore. Yates and his soldiers made an admirable attempt at winning unfortunately the people living in and around Bear Country have a determination that can’t be beat.

Yates and his soldiers will be leaving first thing in the morning. Do I stay or do I go? I am joining Yates for dinner in about an hour. I have promised to give Yates my answer by the end of our meal. My brain is telling me life would be safer and less complicated at Ft Shasta. My heart is telling me not to leave Bear Country. This is my home. Yates is a good man. It would be insane to turn down his offer of a better life.

I think everyone knows I am thinking about leaving. I have been getting looks from people all day long. No one has came out and asked me. I think they are all waiting to see how I make up my mind. I went to the basement to talk to Tony earlier but he wasn’t there. I think he is avoiding me. I hope he doesn’t think avoiding me is going to make it easier for me to make my decision. I need to talk to him. I long for the days when making decisions was a lot easier. I either did what my parents asked me to do or I didn’t.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 162

2005-05-19T03:14:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 162

It has been a strange day. For one thing, it has been raining on and off all morning and the sun is shining. And secondly, I have the feeling a couple of people are trying to play with my mind. I dropped by the cafeteria in hopes of finding an apple in the food stores when I ran into Yates and Tony sitting at one of the tables. I couldn’t hear what they were saying but they were both chatting away. It looked as if they were enjoying themselves. They both acknowledge me as I walked into the room. Yates stood up from the table and gave Tony a hand shake and then walked out of the room but not before giving me a small kiss on the cheek as he passed by. I appreciated the kiss but it felt a bit odd with Tony sitting there. Tony didn’t seem upset about it.

Tony smiled at me and said he would stay and keep me company but that he had to go see a couple of people about a football game. I inquired about “what football game?” but Tony didn’t answer. He was in a hurry. He also kissed me on the cheek as he walked out. I stood there in the middle of the room slightly confused and wondering exactly what happened in my absence. I am certain Yates and Tony are up to no good.

I walked out of the cafeteria without a snack. I made it all the way up to my room before I realized I was still hungry.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 161

2005-05-17T00:43:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 161

Life is quiet around Bear Country. Matt, Hemy and the rest of the Central Bobcats have moved back to the Central Campus. They actually left right after the cobra defeat but I forgot to mention it in my journal. Hemy was so happy to go back home. Matt has decided to join her there. Matt has totally moved out of Bear Country for the second time. Matt and Hemy will be missed but I am glad they are finally getting to start a life together in peace and without distraction. I think Jonas might be a little jealous of his brother. He has not managed to find that one significant other. Although in the eyes of several of the boys and men around here he has a very enviable life. He has no shortage of girls at his door step.

My life is a bit more complicated. I have been splitting my time between Yates and Tony. I have been trying to sort out my feelings for the both of them. Currently they are both running neck and neck. Both Yates and Tony are excellent kissers and they are both so sweet. I am running out of time. Yates expects an answer soon. I think Tony is just hanging out for my answer. Both of them have been for the most part perfect gentlemen. Yates and Tony don’t talk to each other; at least if they have talked to each other I don’t know about it. I have seen the both of them give each other the occasional glance. It was a “have a good day glance” not an “I’m going to kill you later glance”. I am so confused. I think I remember my fairy tales pretty well. This is not how any of the stories were told. What ever happened to dueling and fighting to the death? I don’t want anyone hurt but it would be nice to have a little friction between the two of them. Maybe if I am lucky one of them will turn evil. Of course he won’t be really evil, just misunderstood. I’m sure one of them has a deep dark secret he’s trying to hide. I could find out about it and feel sorry for him. I need something to make my decision easier. Do I go to Ft Shasta or do I stay in Bear country?

The library trio stopped by my room today between my dates with Yates and Tony. The grape vine is once again active in Bear Country. Everyone must know my dilemma by now. Gretchen and Cecelia brought me a book on relationships. They wanted to know if I needed any advice. I thought of asking how they handled their specific living arrangements but changed my mind before I asked. I don’t think I am willing to maintain two boyfriends at the same time. By the way, I still haven’t asked but I am certain Gretchen and Cecelia are both pregnant. Go Marty!!

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 160

2005-05-14T01:27:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 160

It’s sad but true. People die. Before the virus struck I used to be interested in the obituaries in the newspaper. I was curious about who died. Who was the oldest person and who was the youngest person? I really didn’t care who these people were or what they meant to their families. I was just fascinated that they died. These days when someone dies it’s more personal. I have lost more friends than I care to remember.

Tony, Victor, Pete, the library trio (Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia) and me went to the warehouse to see if we could retrieve Hess’s body from the rubble. I thought it would be nice to lay her to rest somewhere instead of leaving her body to decay amongst the rubble. She actually did a lot of good in her short life even if she didn’t end her life on a good note. There was already several Blue Monarchs searching thru the rubble when we arrived at the warehouse. The rubble was still smoldering in places. You had to be careful. I burned a couple of fingers. We searched for a couple of hours but didn’t find her body anywhere.

General Yates and his soldiers are preparing to leave Bear Country. Yesterday morning after the party I went to see how General Yates was doing. I was worried he might be sick. He didn’t look very well when he left the party. Yates was not having a good day. He was barking orders left and right. He grabbed one of the younger soldiers by his shirt and yelled at him to do what he was told. I quickly got the feeling that he was upset with me and his soldiers were feeling the brunt of his anger. I cornered Yates in one of the trucks and kicked the other two soldiers out. I begged Yates to talk to me. It took some time but he finally told me what was wrong. Yates came to Bear Country to help me out and to ask me to go back to Ft Shasta with him.

If I had stayed at Ft Shasta after being kidnapped by Mathias and sold into slavery I could have avoided this whole Bliss and Black Cobra nightmare. I would probably being playing house right now with Yates and his son. Yates knew about the night I stayed in the basement with Tony. Victor had told Yates where I was when he went looking for me to invite me to breakfast. Yates knew where I had been before he even asked. I was caught in a lie. I wasn’t trying to keep Tony a secret. I just didn’t think it was anyone else’s business. If I had realized Yates had feeling for me I would have made a couple of different decisions. I can’t change what has already happened. Yates still wants me to go back to Ft Shasta with him. He has given me two days to make up my mind.

Tony and I have not made any type of commitment to each other. I don’t know how he feels about the other night. I am not sure how I feel about the other night. Tony is a good man and he is my friend.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 159

2005-05-10T22:36:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 159

Most of Bear Country attended the party out at the Spurs Fort. Joshua was once again a wonderful generous host. There was plenty of food, drink and music. General Yates arranged for his soldiers to attend the party in shifts. All of the soldiers deserved a party. I’m glad they all had an opportunity to attend. Yates didn’t spend a lot of time at the party. I don’t think he was feeling well. He left shortly after eating. I wish he had stayed to enjoy the festivities. I offered to walk him back to Bear Country but he insisted I stay at the party. I think everyone who attended the party had a wonderful time. The party was a great deal of fun and it lasted well into the morning hours. Joshua shouldn’t make so much alcohol available.

I think a few people drank a little too much including Tony. Pete helped me get Tony back to Bear Country and put him in bed. The walk back was a challenge. Tony wanted to climb everything and kept trying to fly. It was funny the first couple of attempts and then it became annoying. The walk home took forever. I’m going to have a serious talk with that boy today after he wakes up. If he wakes up. I have a feeling he isn’t going to remember much of what happened.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 158

2005-05-09T17:05:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 158

Everyone living inside Bear Country survived that winter. Many of the other tribes living around Bear Country weren’t so lucky. I saw more than one dead frozen soul on the streets that winter. Each time I saw a dead body I promised myself I wouldn’t let that happen to my friends. We were going to survive no matter what I had to do.

By the time Tony and I climbed out of the basement it was already mid morning. Tony went to town and I went to check on Yates. General Yates and his soldiers were putting the captured Black Cobras into trucks. Preparing to take them away so that they couldn’t cause anymore trouble. Yates wanted to know where I had been all morning. He had stopped by my room around 7am to see if I wanted to join him for breakfask but I wasn’t there. I came up with some excuse about waking up early and going for a walk to clear my head.

Joshua from the Spurs Tribe dropped by to give me a hug and to congratulate General Yates and his soldiers on defeating Cain and the Black Cobras. General Yates said thankyou but said we shouldn’t get too excited. He said that most likely there was still people out there producing Bliss and distributing it in the community. Yates had a good point. Totally getting rid of Bliss in the community is probably never going to happen. Joshua invited everyone in Bear Country , General Yates and his soldiers out to the Spurs Fort for a party. He said it would help with morale. We accepted.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 157

2005-05-08T17:10:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 157

It was a long cold winter. I kept Cain a secret and I prayed for spring. Each time I went to Cain I told myself I was never going back no matter how hungry I was. The kids of Bear Country continued with our daily food hunting excursions but kept coming up empty handed. After several days without eating I had no choice but to return to Cain. He was the only source of food I knew about. Each time I knocked on his door he would smile and invite me in. The cost of food kept rising. I was forced to do more and more awful things. Cain had a short temper and his friends weren’t any better. If I refused a request I was beaten and pushed out into the cold with only half the food I was promised or none at all. I explained my bruises by telling my friends someone attacked me on the street.

My nightmare ended when the snow melted and the agriculture club moved into Bear Country. Shortly after the last time I knocked on Cain’s door I heard a rumor that he was killed in a freak accident when he tripped and fell in front of a truck. Cain had more enemies than he had friends. I guess the rumor was false.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 156

2005-05-06T17:07:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 156

I was feeling guilty. I had eaten the entire can and I still had no food for my friends. I kept looking at the cases of peaches stacked against the wall. I thought of stealing a couple of cans and running away. After thinking about it for a few moments I realized there was no way I could outrun Cain and his friends. I was so cold and my legs were barely holding me up.

Cain kept smiling at me. He had a nice smile and nice eyes. His voice was very comforting. He asked if I was still hungry. I said no even though I was certain I could eat an entire case all by myself. I was trying to get up the nerve to ask for some cans for my friends back at Bear Country. Cain saw me staring at the peaches against the wall. He said he was willing to barter for them. I told him I had nothing to trade. He said I had plenty to trade and what I had looked pretty decent. And so my nightmare began.

I carried four cans of peaches home to Bear Country that day. I told my friends I had found them in an abandoned apartment.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 155

2005-05-05T17:05:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 155

After I showered I went down to the basement. Tony had prepared us a meal. There was enough food in the basement to last us week. Neither of us ate very much. I think we were both too tired to eat. Tony and I sat on his bed and talked for awhile. It was nice. The conversation accidently turned serious so Tony told a couple of really bad jokes to change the subject. The jokes made me laugh. I needed a laugh.

It’s about 3 or 4am. I think. It’s hard to tell down here, there’s only one small window and I didn’t bring my watch. I thought of looking at Tony’s but he wears his watch on the bottom side of his wrist. I would have to move his arm to read it. Tony has been sleeping so soundly. I didn’t want to disturb him.

I couldn’t sleep. I kept dreaming about the winter I spent under Cain’s torment. It was our first winter after moving into Bear Country. We weren’t prepared for the cold. I can’t remember ever seeing that much snow. We were living from one day to the next and neglected to store food up for the winter. By the time we realized we had no food stores it was pretty much too late to do anything about it. We took turns going out into the cold searching for food. Most of the time we came back empty handed. The streets were pretty much deserted that winter. The cold and snow kept people inside huddled in masses. I was so hungry and desperate. If I didn’t find us something to eat my friends and I were going to die. By sheer chance I ran into Cain. He and a couple of his friends were standing around a fire barrel laughing and eating canned peaches. They had a couple of cases stacked against the building. I begged for some. Cain smiled at me and opened a can. I think I ate the whole can in one gulp.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 154

2005-05-04T23:10:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 154

I have given out more hugs in the last two hours than I have given out all year long. I have said it before but I have some good friends. General Yates and his soldiers are out side securing the captured Black Cobras. Yates dropped by a few minutes ago to see how I was doing. He is so sweet. Tony dropped by my room shortly before that and invited me to get something to eat. I asked him to give me a little while. I needed to finish with this journal entry and shower. I’d drop by his room when I was done.

My brain is a little wonky. I am having some serious difficulty forming thoughts in my head. I’ve been trying to write everything down that happened before I forget it. I am so tired. I need to tuck myself into bed. I need to shower first. I stink. I wish I had a bathtub. My stomach is growling. I am not sure when I ate last. Yesterday at breakfast maybe.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 153

2005-05-03T23:18:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 153

As we reached the Black Cobra tribe building Cain jumped up on the front steps and invited the crowd to join the festivities. His girlfriend was drooling all over him, still making a fuss and telling Cain how great he was. Her continuous talking was making my headache turn into a migraine. I wanted to tell her to shut the (insert dirty word) up.

The girls and I were paraded to the front of the stairs and forced to kneel on our knees facing the crowd. Cain sent a couple of Black Cobras into their tribe building to get the Cobras that were inside so that they could watch our execution. The crowd suddenly went hush. Cain started to give a speech about defeating the enemy. I knew we were getting ready to die so I closed my eyes and tried to think of something else.

I heard a gun go off and Cain stop speaking in mid-sentence. He fell down the stairs and landed beside Hemy and me. I think I was frozen where I was kneeling. The crowd panicked and tried to run. I stayed where I was. Tony reached down and grabbed my arm to help me to my feet. It took me a moment to realize who he was. I hugged his neck and started to cry, again. I thought Tony and the others had died in the explosion. That’s when I noticed General Yates and about 50 of his soldiers surrounding the crowd. Yates looked at me and with a smile said “I told you I had things under control.”

General Yates and his soldiers rounded up all the Black Cobras they could find and burned the Cobras tribe building to the ground.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 152

2005-05-02T23:09:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 152

I was on my knees in the gravel staring back at the burning building. I think I was in shock. Some of my closest and dearest friends were in that building. Cain was dancing around like a fool gloating over his accomplishment. His girlfriend was dancing with him. She stroked his ego by saying he was the best leader ever. She even suggested Cain make himself King.

After a couple more minutes of hero worship and gloating Cain demanded we all get back on our feet. We continued down the road toward the Black Cobra’s tribe building. We had started to draw a crowd. The whole town must have heard the explosions. I hadn’t seen this many people in the streets in a long time. I felt like I was on display. In the back of my mind I was worried about how bad I looked. Would someone write about this day? How was I going to be portrayed on the page? Would they say I was a good leader or a bad one? Some of the people on the street cheered as we passed by. The people cheering were Black Cobras and a few tribe members loyal to the Cobras. A majority of the people just stood there. A few of them looked as if they wanted to help but were afraid to try. I tried to look confident even though I was dying inside.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 151

2005-05-02T11:24:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 151

Cain never liked it when people didn’t do what he asked immediately. I knew from first hand experience that Cain’s temper was short. I felt his fists on more than one occasion. He yelled one more time for General Yates and his soldiers to toss their weapons out the window. To prove he was serious about his threat of blowing the room up he pushed a button and blew up the adjacent storage building. The explosion was so loud I thought we were all getting ready to die. General Yates and his soldiers tossed their guns out the window. I was praying Yates had a plan.

Cain had our attention and to prove he was in charge and to prove he controlled our fates he pushed Hess over the railing. She hit the floor with an awful thud. I couldn’t help but cry. Once the tears started I couldn’t make them stop. I asked Cain “Why did you do that?” He simply said “Because I can.” Cain’s sidekick seemed to enjoy the display of cruelty. She was jumping around in the loft laughing and clapping.

Cain had his Black Cobras tie Yates, Jonas, Matt, Pete, Joshua and the rest of the boys to poles in the room. The girls and I were led out and marched up the street with Cain and his girlfriend in the lead. We had walked about two blocks when we heard the building we just left blow up. The explosion was so big several of us were knocked off our feet.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 150

2005-04-30T07:14:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 150

I thought Cain had died long ago. I had no idea he was the leader of the Black Cobras. I could have sworn it was someone else I had seen previously. I stood there in the middle of the floor looking up at the loft. Cain was standing there looking down at me with that giant toothy grin on his face. (That face used to haunt me in my dreams.) The girl who had been tied up with the explosives yesterday stood beside him, all happy and smiling. She had Hess tied to a rope. Leading her like a dog. Cain must have had Hess beaten. She looked like the walking dead.

I was trying to think of something clever to say and at the same time hold back the nausea I was feeling. The past I had tried to forget had suddenly rushed forward. The hunger, the cold, the abuse, and the awful things he made me do. It was an awful winter. Our resources were few and we were starving to death. I hadn’t eaten in days. Some of the other kids were already walking skeletons. I went out to search for food.

I was so hungry that I would do just about anything for a bite to eat. I ran into Cain. He had a smile to die for. I thought he was an angel sent to save my friends and me. I didn’t realize until it was too late that the smile he enjoyed showing off was hiding the face of evil.

I must have been a nice shade of green because Yates whispered for me to relax he had things under control. I didn’t see control. Cain demanded Yates and his soldiers toss their weapons out the far window or he would blow up the room.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 149

2005-04-29T01:40:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 149

We have all been awake for more than 24 hours. I have a horrible headache and I am sure my adrenalin level is probably off the scale. Sneaking up to the warehouse at 3 am and capturing the Black Cobras was actually quite simple. Too simple when I think about it now. We stormed the warehouse and disarmed the guards with almost no effort at all. I remember thinking “That was so easy. I don’t know what we were worried about.” We all started jumping up and down and praising ourselves for our accomplishment. The prisoners were all glad to see us. They had been in the warehouse for almost two days without food and water. I hugged and kissed Yates and thanked him for all of his help. I was starting to feel better about getting our community back to the way it was before Bliss and the Black Cobras ruined everything. It didn’t hit me that something was wrong until I heard the doors slam shut. Everyone let out a gasp and then the room went quiet. We were caught off guard. We had walked into a trap.

I heard clapping and someone from the loft say “Well done.”

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 148

2005-04-27T23:28:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 148

I have some incredible friends. We held a tribe meeting and everyone agreed handing over Bear Country to the Black Cobras isn’t an option. We will not give up our home without a fight. Without General Yates and his soldiers none of what we are about to do would have been possible.

We have only a short amount of time to prepare. The sooner we make our move the better. We are trying to catch the Black Cobras off guard and unprepared. I am certain the Cobras will be expecting a fight. I wish we had more time. Victor has been a great help. I think he is trying to make amends. Pete, a couple of his deputies and a couple of Yates’s soldiers went to gather information about the warehouse where Victor is certain the prisoners are being held. I am keeping my fingers crossed that Victor knows what he is talking about. As soon as Pete returns we will be able to make our final plans.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 147

2005-04-27T01:26:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 147

I remember my mom and dad saying that using vulgarity was a waste of time. It served no useful purpose except to prove to others that you have not learned the skills necessary to communicate properly. That maybe so but…as I was standing on the curb reading the demands of the Black Cobras and staring at that poor girl those were the only words that came to mind. I seem to use a lot of dirty words lately.

General Yates wanted to send several of his soldiers into Bear Country High School to retrieve the Black Cobras and Hess. He was ready to hand them over. I objected. I wanted to think things thru. Pete and Yates both looked at me as if I was crazy. Pete pointed out the highlights of the note. Time was a critical issue and we didn’t have any. One hour, release Cobras and turn over Hess or girl goes boom! Yates asked one of his soldiers to check out the explosives to make sure they were probably real. They looked real enough and they didn’t look as if we could remove them safely. At that point in time none of use was willing to take the chance they weren’t real. The girl was hysterical; she didn’t want to blow up. Time was ticking.

We watched the Black Cobras, Hess and the girl with the explosives walk back down the street. The girl needed help walking. Her legs were so wobbly. I didn’t even ask her name. Hess wasn’t happy about going. She put up a fuss. The Cobras insisted she stay tied. I have a feeling I have sent her to her death.

The countdown begins. Only 23 hours until we are expected to hand over Bear Country to the Black Cobras.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 146

2005-04-25T12:52:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 146

The Black Cobras thru a glitch in my plans. I hate when that happens.

When I was in the fourth grade before the virus I tried to cheat on a test. I didn’t need to cheat I was just trying to guarantee that the plaque I worked for all year long ended up as mine. The desks in my school were all old they had been written on probably by three or four generations of students. I decided I would scratch the answers to Friday’s test on my desk. The person with the highest score on this test would win the plaque my teacher had displayed on the wall all year long. All week I carefully placed the answers on my desk so that it didn’t look too suspicious. The day of the test my teacher in all of her wisdom decided to have all of us switch seats. She had never done that before. All of my hard work and preparations to cheat were ruined in a moment. I ended up on the far side of the room.

I had no idea who she was. I didn’t recognize any of her tribe markings. Pete and a couple of his deputies stepped out into the street to retrieve the message written on the bright yellow flag. Yates’s soldiers kept cover and made sure no one else snuck up on Bear Country. I didn’t realize the seriousness of the situation until Pete and his deputies suddenly stepped backwards. This girl had explosives attached to her waist. She dropped to her knees and started to plead for our help. We had an hour to release the Black Cobras and turn Hess over or the explosives would detonate. The Black Cobras were holding a dozen prisoners in a local warehouse. If Bear Country didn’t submit to Cobra Rule and turn over all assets within 24 hours all the prisoners would die.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 145

2005-04-24T04:43:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 145

By noon we had a reply from the Black Cobras. It wasn’t the reply we had hoped for. Yates and I had sent a message demanding the Black Cobras stop making Bliss available to the community and that they leave the local area. If our demands were not met and agreed upon General Yates and his soldiers would attack the Black Cobras tribe building. A deadline of one day was given for a reply. We were confident that the Cobras wouldn’t want to tangle with General Yates and his soldiers. We were ready and prepared for retaliation. Yates put his soldiers on high alert and we spread the word that no one from Bear Country was to leave campus unless absolutely necessary. Pete sent a couple of deputies out to the Spurs Fort. The deputies were instructed to take the long way around and to avoid Black Cobras at all cost. I wanted Joshua and his tribe to know what was happening. So that he could take the necessary precautions. The Cobras might decide to attack friends of Bear Country.

The Black Cobras got our attention in a very unexpected way. I was a little surprised by their creativity and wit. General Yates mumbled something about the Black Cobras having a formidable leader. This time the Cobras didn’t risk sending one of their own. They had learned from their previous mistake. One of Yates’s soldiers spotted her walking up the center of the street about three blocks away.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 144

2005-04-22T02:59:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 144

My sanity is sometimes questionable. I have been known to occasionally question the sanity of others. I sometimes wonder if any of us are truly sane. The oddest thing happened today. I was sitting outside on the steps of the school discussing security issues with Pete and General Yates. A group of Black Cobras walked up Lafayette Blvd carrying a white flag. It was one of those eyebrow-lifting moments. It almost looked as if they were surrendering.

Pete, Yates and I jumped up off the steps and met the Cobras at the curb. This is where the sanity issue comes into play. The Cobras actually asked us to give them Hess. If they had to spend the last two nights in Bear Country with her screaming and yelling vulgarity they would have rethought that request. The Cobras should have seen last night’s shower fiasco. Hess purposely soiled her bed. We had to untie her and put her in the showers. There is almost nothing worse than wrestling with a naked Blue Monarch suffering from withdrawal. I must be insane because sane people wouldn’t submit themselves to this type of insanity.

Bear Country is probably currently one of the safest places to be. There are soldiers from Fort Shasta all over the place and they have guns. The Spurs Fort is probably the next safest. Almost everyone there also carries a gun. Which is why seeing the Black Cobras walk up Lafayette Blvd carrying a white flag and demanding we give them Hess makes me think the Cobras are insane.

The population of Bear Country has increased by two. We took two of the Black Cobras captive. You should have seen the expression on their faces when Yates soldiers refused to let them leave. The third Cobra was sent back home with our reply and our demands. (Note to myself: Capturing Black Cobras is easier if they come to you.)

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 143

2005-04-21T06:43:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 143

It was a long night as expected. Hess is still making a fuss, although she was actually quiet for a couple of hours. Pete’s deputies have been taking turns keeping an eye on her just incase she escapes from the restraints holding her to the bed. I dropped by to check on her progress and had to leave shortly afterwards. She has a mouth like a sailor. I tried to be good and not spit profanity back at her but I failed. I feel sorry for her and it is very difficult to see her this way but I can’t help think that she should have known better than to try Bliss. I thought she had more common sense than that. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised half the population currently uses Bliss.

I ran into Tony at breakfast. Victor had bad dreams all night long and now refuses to come out of the basement. I’m not surprised if someone had tied me to a post and threatened to light me on fire I’d probably have bad dreams too. If fact, I do have bad dreams on occasion. My life after the virus has not been easy. I have a lot of bad memories I wish I could forget. We’ll save those stories for another time.

The library trio came back with information on how to safely help Hess with her addiction. Time, friendship and understanding are currently our only options. We’ll see. She is going to beat this or she won’t. I hope she calms down soon. People are starting to get irritable. Several people have moved to the other side of the building to get away from the screaming and profanity she seems to think is necessary. I even heard a couple people suggest we hand her over to the Black Cobras. They were suffering from lack of sleep, I think.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 142

2005-04-20T07:28:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 142

Before Joshua went backed to the Spurs Fort I thanked him for saving Victor and the Black Cobras from being burned to death. His quick thinking allowed Yates the time to send his soldiers around behind Hess and keep her from lighting the fire. I have no love for the Black Cobras but I draw the line at burning people at the stake. Those three boys would have died a gruesome death if Joshua hadn’t been passing by.

The rest of the evening at Bear Country has been interesting. Hess was tied to a bed to keep her from harming herself or anyone else. Pete has put guards in her room to keep her company. The library trio (Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia) are looking up the proper procedure to detoxify someone safely. I am thinking the only thing we are going to be able to do is to keep her away from Bliss and make sure she drinks water. I don’t know how long she has been using Bliss but I have a feeling her withdrawal from Bliss is not going to be a quiet happy one. I have a feeling I am not going to get much sleep for the next few days.

Victor received several showers. The first couple of showers he wasn’t using soap. The result was that he still smelled like gasoline. The smallest spark and Victor was going to light up like a Christmas tree. Tony kept sending him back to the showers and told him if he didn’t use soap he wasn’t getting any dinner. I don’t know why boys try to avoid soap.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 141

2005-04-19T02:33:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 141

The crowd continued to increase. The Black cobras struggled with their restraints that held them to the post. I think everyone was holding their breath. Most of Bear Country was present including Tony. Tony was having a great deal of trouble letting Joshua handle the situation. I was having trouble letting Joshua handle the situation. He was doing well considering the circumstances. It would have been stupid to intervene with the dialog Joshua was establishing with Hess. All the people gathering around were starting to make Hess nervous. She started waving the torch at people and talking about how the Cobras have ruined her life. I was holding my breath hoping Joshua could convince Hess not to torch the Black Cobras. Especially not Victor. He made several bad choices but he didn’t deserve to die by being burned at the stake.

Yates whispered in my ear he had an idea. He silently sent a couple of his soldiers around behind Hess. The next few minutes were extremely intense as Joshua tried to get Hess to focus her attention toward him. Yates’s soldiers slowly crept up on Hess. The crowd aware of what was happening said nothing. There were a couple of Blue Monarchs in the crowd. I continued to hold my breath hoping no one would tip Hess off that someone was sneaking up behind her. One soldier grabbed Hess as the other grabbed the torch before it hit the ground igniting the Black Cobras.

After the ordeal ended. I offered to take the now bound Hess back to Bear Country. She was not herself. The Blue Monarchs in the crowd said they had been having difficulties with her. Their numbers had dwindled down to a few because she was out of control. They welcomed having her off their hands.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 140

2005-04-16T07:23:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 140

When I was younger I admired Hess and her undying dedication to a cause. I think I liked her because she always seemed to have a level head and she preached peace. During the mail war one of the slogans that was preached daily was “Tribes helping Tribes to survive”. When the mail war ended Hess was inspirational in getting the tribes to work together. Hess dropped out of site soon after that. I was glad to hear she had returned when the difficulties with the Black Cobras began. I was certain she could help solve the problem.

Yates and I were sitting in the back of one of the trucks working out the final details of our plan against the Black Cobras when one the members from the Spurs tribe came running up the sidewalk. He was frantic and calling my name over and over again. Yates and I jumped out of the truck just about the time a couple of soldiers tackled him to the ground.

I’m not sure when Hess lost her mind but it was obvious she was not working with a full deck by the time we made it to the field. Hess looked as if she hadn’t slept in days. Her hair and clothes were a mess. She was acting like a crazy women. Three Black Cobras were hooded and tied to post. The area smelled like gasoline. The field was filled with people from several of the local tribes. Joshua was already there. He was doing his best to keep Hess from lighting the fire. It wasn’t until that moment that I realized that Victor(Scat) was one of the Black Cobras tied to the post.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 139

2005-04-15T02:03:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 139

I didn’t go to bed until late. I was up talking with Yates, Tony, Hemy, Matt and Pete. We sat in the cafeteria, discussed the Black Cobras and ate cinnamon buns until way after midnight. Hemy stumbled across the cinnamon buns at a roadside stand and traded a rechargeable battery for them. They were so good. I haven’t had a cinnamon bun in years.

I slept so well after I crawled into my bed. I think it’s because General Yates and his soldiers were sleeping out on my front lawn. I offered to let them sleep in the gymnasium but Yates said they would be more comfortable sleeping outside underneath the stars. With actual soldiers standing guard around Bear Country my worries of a Black Cobra invasion have been eliminated. At least for the moment.

By the time I woke Yates and his soldiers had already put in a full days work. Yates sent some of his men out on a mission to gather information. They were returning by the time I finished with my breakfast. Joshua arrived shortly after that. He apologized for not being able to attend a meeting yesterday but there had been trouble out at the Spurs Fort.

Joshua hasn’t had a lot of difficulty or problems out at the Spurs Fort unless you count the cattle raiders that were a significant problem when they first moved to Bear Country. Most of the local tribes look at the Spurs as an asset to the community. To my surprise the difficulties yesterday involved the Blue Monarchs. A couple of Joshua’s tribe members were on security rounds and discovered two dead Monarchs sitting against their south wall. It looked as if they had overdosed on Bliss.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 138

2005-04-13T08:58:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 138

Joshua sent a return runner to Bear Country. He couldn’t attend a meeting until tomorrow. He had issues to deal with at the Spurs Fort that couldn’t wait. Our runner sent to get in touch with Hess of the Blue Monarchs returned without an answer. She has once again gone into hiding.

General Yates and I had a long talk. When I sent Pete and Jonas to Fort Shasta I was hoping General Yates could help us with a solution to get rid of the Black Cobras. Our own efforts are failing. We have tried to stop their supply lines but Bliss continues to poor into the community. We have placed posters all around town discouraging people from joining the Cobras. We have held rallies protesting against the Black Cobras and their production of Bliss. The Black Cobras retaliate by placing people in their jails, humiliating them in the streets or worse executing them for everyone to see. Life as a Black Cobra is not an easy one they have a great deal of enemies. I have run across several dead Cobras displayed in the streets. No one claims the kill for fear of retaliation. Their numbers still continue to grow.

The streets are filled with people unable to stand, walk, or talk clear sentences. They sleep in the gutters. The Black Cobras continue to recruit. Their tribe numbers grow daily. Individual tribe assets are quickly becoming Black Cobra property. Out of desperation and the need for more Bliss people swear their allegiance and hand over their property to the Cobras.

I took Yates on a tour of the safer parts of town around Bear Country. I wanted him to see what was happening. (We didn’t go alone we had several armed guards carrying weapons.) Even in the safe part of town you could see the effects of Bliss on the community. Yates was impressed by the tour and at the same time appalled by what he saw. He asked me to leave this behind and return with him to the safety of Fort Shasta. I think I need to try and fix the problem. For some reason it just feels wrong to walk away. I am tempted.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 137

2005-04-11T22:58:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 137

Pete and Jonas have returned home safely and in time to save the day. I think I worried the entire time they were gone. The walk toward Fort Shasta led right thru Alexandria City and Mathias’ slave trade. Security has not been the same since Pete left. His deputies did a good job but I feel safer when Pete is here. Matt was glad to see his brother again. He never mentioned Jonas being gone but you could tell on his return that Matt missed him. Hugs and High fives were everywhere.

I felt tremendous relief when I saw Yates jump off the truck. If anyone could help solve the Black Cobra and Bliss problem it was Yates and his soldiers. I could have avoided this entire Black Cobra issue if I had stayed with Yates at Fort Shasta. I was so very close to giving up everything here.

Yates had his soldiers park their trucks around Bear Country and he posted guards. I am hoping to have a tribal meeting. I sent a runner to get Joshua. I also sent a runner to try and get a hold of Hess and the Blue Monarchs. If she can be found I don’t think she will attend the meeting but I thought it would be politically correct to invite her. She is very allusive and has her own agenda.

Information travels fast. It wasn’t long before tribes from the surrounding area were checking out Yates soldiers and the trucks he brought to Bear Country.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 136

2005-04-10T09:39:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 136

Yesterday was a long and tiring day. Matt, Hemy, Tony, Lisa and I went hunting for Black Cobras. We didn’t catch any. Actually we didn’t make much of an effort because even if we did capture a Cobra while in the middle of town we wouldn’t have been able to get him out without being seen. There were entirely too many blockades to get thru. I think catching Black Cobras should be reserved for those Cobras traveling on the edge of town or those near Bear Country. Bear Country has not given up on its fight with the Cobras our efforts to undermine their hold on our town continues in many other ways.

I was exhausted and my feet hurt by the time we got back to Bear Country. Tony and I grabbed something to eat. He was in the mood to talk. I don’t think I actually comprehended half of what he was saying during the meal. Afterward, I went up to my room in the admin hallway and went to bed.

Around 8 am this morning one of Pete’s deputies interrupted my perfectly good sleep by knocking on my door. The Black Cobras were on our front lawn. They were trying to place signs on our campus claiming Bear Country was under new management. Yesterday I made a regrettable decision. Signing those documents to get patches to gain easier access to areas blocked off in town was a mistake in judgment. I should have followed my gut feelings.

I think I was the last person to know the Black Cobras were in Bear Country. (See what happens when I sleep in.) Almost everyone residing in Bear Country was already outside. Hemy, Tony and a couple of Pete’s deputies were holding back the Cobras trying to keep them from entering Bear Country. Matt was actually fighting with one of the Black Cobras on the front lawn. Matt looked like he was winning. I was getting ready to break up the fight when I heard trucks coming up the street. It was General Yates and a group of his soldiers from Ft Shasta. The army had arrived. I have never been so glad to see someone. The Cobras didn’t hang around but the leader of the little gang trying to gain access to Bear Country said they would be back. I don’t doubt they’ll try.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 135

2005-04-09T01:55:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 135

Matt, Hemy, Tony, Lisa and I went traveling thru town looking for Black Cobras to abduct. I felt like we were mice in a maze. It seems like every time we turned a corner we would run into a blockade. The only people allowed thru the blockade were those wearing Black Cobra patches. Matt and Hemy suggested we all get patches. It would make our travel thru town easier and less time consuming. I was totally against that. I was not going to wear one of those patches and be associated with being a follower of the Black Cobras. We all ducked behind a building and debated the issue. After several minutes of a semi loud discussion I agreed this once to wear the patch. I was not wearing it on a daily basis and it comes off as soon as we were on the edge of town. The five of us walked up to a Cobra Barricade. We joyfully asked for a patch.

Getting the patch wasn’t as easy as we thought it would be. We all had to agree to have our pictures taken, finger prints and sign a document that said we agreed to the rules and laws set forth by the Black Cobras. I almost backed out. I did not want to sign on the line. I felt as if I was betraying Bear Country. I could tell the others were having the same thoughts. Traveling thru town was easier with the patch. The Black Cobras just waved you thru the barricades. Which could partly explain why so many people had them.

The patch didn’t solve our other issue. Even if we caught a Black Cobra, how were we suppose to get him or her to the Blue Monarchs holding area for disposal.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 134

2005-04-08T08:42:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 134

We voted and Victor lost.

I felt sorry for Victor. He stood in the center of the room staring at the floor. Not once did he raise his head. I think he knew how the vote was going to play out before we even began. I gave everyone in the room the chance to voice their opinions on why Victor should be allowed to stay in Bear Country. Not one person spoke up to defend him. It was unanimous vote. Victor would have to pack his things and leave.

After the vote everyone returned to what ever they were doing before the meeting. Victor received a few words of encouragement and pats on the back. It was nice that people didn’t just walk out of the room and ignore his feelings. After everyone cleared the room I asked Tony if he wanted me to escort Victor out. He said “No” he would do it himself. Tony escorted Victor to the basement and let him gather his things. A short while later, with a sack of belongings on his back Victor left Bear Country. I have no idea if he even has a place to stay. I am hoping he doesn’t have to spend too much time on the streets. Life outside of Bear Country can be a scary place. I wish him well.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 133

2005-04-07T13:09:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 133

After bandaging Victor’s wounds we put him in one of the empty rooms down the hall to recover. I would have sent him down to the basement to his own room but Tony doesn’t want him there. Victor hasn’t stepped one foot out of that room for more than a day. He is still alive. I checked in on him a couple of times. He has to be hungry. The offerings of food from the garden the agriculture club is raising remained untouched. I think he feels guilty about his actions. He should feel guilty. What he did was wrong. The Black Cobras are our worst enemies since the Hulk was in power.

Sometimes life gets really complicated. I hate hard decisions. After I returned from the meeting with Hess I ran into Tony in the admin hallway. He said Victor had to go. If I hadn’t been thinking the exact same thing I would have thought Tony wanted Victor out of Bear Country to get back at the little Cobra want to be. Tony was making perfect sense. I couldn’t think of one good reason why we should let Victor stay, except for maybe his age. Bear Country is at war with the Black Cobras and having Victor among us compromises our mission.

We are holding a meeting in an hour to tell Victor he has to leave Bear Country.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 132

2005-04-05T00:56:00.000-07:00

Podcast Journal Entry 132

You’ll be glad to know that Hess of the Blue Monarchs is alive and well. I guess this is a good thing. I’m not sure anymore. She no longer dresses in her usual kimonos. Instead she was dressed in fatigues and her hair was tied up in a pony tail. Her personality has changed too. Some how, some where she lost the “Lets all live in peace.” I think she has gone over to the dark side of the force.

I was invited to another secret meeting. It was the same drill as before including the blindfold to the undisclosed location. Hess scolded all of us for not making more of an effort to get rid of the Black Cobras. Apparently our laziness, indifference and unsupporting allegiance to the cause have allowed the Cobras to thrive in our community. We were all given a new list of tasks to perform against the Cobras which included capturing as many Black Cobras as possible and delivering them to a holding area. The Blue Monarchs would take care of them from there. Hess said our time of playing nice is over. I tried to talk to Hess after the meeting but she wasn’t interested in hearing anything I had to say. She looked at me straight in the eye and said that I had been given my tribe’s responsibilities. In a little snippy voice she adds “Try to follow thru this time.” Before I could reply she adds “If you need anything else talk to one of my admin officers.” Then she walked out of the room. “What the (insert dirty word/s here).” The girl has gone over the edge. I am having my doubts about her sanity. She is not the person I knew during the mail war.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 131

2005-04-03T00:44:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 131

I was discussing the Black Cobra issues with Matt and Hemy when Tony came through the front doors of Bear Country. He didn’t look as if he had been in a battle so I assumed he hadn’t located Victor. I was getting ready to ask Tony if he had enjoyed his walk when Matt spoke up and asked if Scat (Victor) was road kill. Tony thought for a moment before answering. He said he had initially ran out to catch Victor and bring him back to Bear Country but after walking around town for a couple of hours he decided it wasn’t worth the effort. If Victor wanted to be apart of the Black Cobras he could accept the consequences. I was getting ready to agree when in stumbled Victor through the front doors. He looked awful. He was bleeding and bruised. My first thought was that a tribe that didn’t agree with the Cobra’s way of thinking caught him. The four of us, Matt, Hemy, Tony and I stood there staring at him. Do we help? Do we pretend he isn’t there? Do we kick him back to the curb? Victor was practically in tears. I hate it when people cry. He stretched out a bleeding arm and asked for help. I turned to look at Tony and ask him to help me get Scat upstairs. Tony shook his head “no” and walked away toward the basement. I turned to Matt and asked for his help. Victor is a little twit and probably not worth the effort (definitely not worth the effort) but at that moment I couldn’t kick him out of Bear Country. Matt and Hemy helped me get Victor upstairs.

Hemy helped me clean out and bandage Victor’s wounds. I know it’s mean but we weren’t trying to be gentle. I caused as much discomfort as possible. Call it pay back for Victor’s treacherous deeds. Victor sat through the whole thing trying not to cry or say ouch!

Victor thought he was joining an elite group of the Black Cobras. He spent the last week performing task to prove he was worthy. It was just a Cobra game. After helping the Cobras steal our food Victor was told he was too young to join the elite group. Victor received his injuries after he realized he had been tricked and attacked one of the older boys.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 130

2005-04-02T09:15:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 130 - Podcast not available

Today was not a good day to go to town. I woke up early and went to town to see if I could barter for candles. I found the candles but while I was away in town trying to avoid Black Cobras in the street, Bear Country had guests. Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia said they were leaving the media center when Victor arrived with a dozen of his Black Cobra Friends. Victor led them straight to our food stores.

An attempt was made to stop the Cobras from taking our food but most of Bear Country was out for the day. Victor and his friends took practically everything that was in the kitchen. The little runt needs to pray I don’t run into him when he is alone.

Tony has actually left the basement. I just wish I knew where he was at this moment. Tony spent the day in town putting up posters protesting against the Black Cobras. When he returned to Bear Country he went straight to the kitchen for something to eat. Tony was a little upset when he discovered everything was gone. He was more upset when I told him who took our food. I hope Victor is wearing his fast shoes.

Pete and Jonas have been gone for several days. I am keeping my fingers crossed they have already arrived at their destination.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 129

2005-04-01T11:18:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 129 - Podcast not available

My stay out at the Spurs Fort was very peaceful and relaxing. I even slept well in the bunkhouse. Joshua woke me up around 7 am with pancakes and a cup of coffee. It was so very sweet. I left for home after breakfast. Joshua tried to get me to stay and he made the offer again for Bear Country to merge with the Spurs. I declined but I was tempted to say yes. I can’t make that kind of decision on my own. Everyone in Bear Country would have to agree for that to happen.

Joshua offered to walk me home. It was a nice thought but I really wanted to be alone at that particular moment. The walk home was quiet for the most part. I really should try to avoid the center of town. It’s hard to avoid the Black Cobras there. I ran into Victor and a couple of his friends. I would have taken another route if I had known I was going to step into his path. It wasn’t a bad encounter, a little teasing nothing I couldn’t handle. I think Victor was trying to impress his new friends. I tried to be calm and not combative. I asked Victor if he has plans to return to Bear Country any time soon. He didn’t answer. He just walked away.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 128

2005-03-30T10:51:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 128

I couldn’t spend one more moment cooped up inside Bear Country. I wasn’t in the mood to tear down Black Cobra posters or throw manure at unsuspecting Cobras from the rooftops. No one wanted to go to town anyway. Tony is still locked in the basement. He won’t talk to me or let me in. It sounds like he is building something in there. I could hear banging and clanging coming from inside the room as I stood outside the door.

Out of desperation for companionship I walked out to the Spurs Fort to spend the day with Joshua. I kept my fingers crossed the whole walk there and I prayed he wasn’t too busy to spend a little time with me. I needed someone to talk to.

Joshua was busy but he let me help out with whatever task he was working on.
I worked hard most of the day. I’m going to be sore in the morning. I can already feel my muscles protesting about the day’s unexpected workout. I usually try to avoid physical labor but today it felt good. Sleeping tonight shouldn’t be a problem. Joshua is letting me sleep in one of the newly built bunk houses and he promised me a grand breakfast in the morning.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 127

2005-03-29T12:47:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 127

I’ve been sitting at my desk, staring out the window. It’s a beautiful sunny day outside but you couldn’t tell it by the mood inside of Bear Country. The mood in here is extremely depressing. Almost no one is venturing out of their rooms. The people I have seen are walking around without saying much of anything to anyone. The younger children are usually running up and down the halls. I haven’t seen any of them today.

Tony has locked himself inside the basement. He won’t let me in. I asked Tony if he wanted to join me for breakfast. I volunteered to make pancakes or anything he wanted to eat. He turned me down. I went back at lunch to see if he wanted to go to the arcade. He said no again and asked me to go away. I walked away but only after making a couple more attempts at gaining entrance.

Hemy and the Central Bobcats are attempting to make themselves at home inside Bear Country. They have taken up residence in the empty classrooms in the west wing of the school. They mostly keep to themselves. I think they are still recovering from having to leave their home. Hemy is handling things much better than I would. I would be a crazy woman if I had to give up my home. Matt is doing his best to make the transition as easy as possible and he has finally moved out of his room in the admin hallway. I was beginning to think he was never going to give up that room. Today he moved all of his stuff in with Hemy in the west wing.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 126

2005-03-28T14:20:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 126

It was an early morning for Tony and I. I think we left Bear Country around 4 am. There are less people up at that hour. It makes sabotaging the Black Cobras easier. Not necessarily safer but easier. Tony and I were making considerable progress when we unexpectedly came across a group of Black Cobras tormenting a couple of Blue Monarchs. The Blue Monarchs were being teased, shoved and slapped around. Tony and I were just getting ready to intervene and stop the madness when we noticed one of the Cobras was Victor. The two of us dove behind a couple of burning barrels. I had to stop Tony from jumping out at Victor and ringing his scrawny little neck.

The Cobras are the scum of the earth. They beat people up for fun. This is not something new. Tony was pissed. He said a few words I rather not repeat. I don’t think he was pissed because the Cobras were beating up Blue Monarchs. I think Tony was pissed because Victor was one of them. I was pissed Victor was one of them. It is sad to say but I wish we had not taken in the little runt. We gave him food and shelter. He would have starved to death if it had not been for Tony.

We couldn’t intervene and save the Blue Monarchs from their tormentors. Victor would have recognized us and led the Black Cobras back to Bear Country. It was difficult but we chose to sneak away and let the Blue Monarchs attempt to escape from the Cobras on their own.

Tony didn’t say anything all the way back home but I could tell he was angry and disappointed. I feel bad for him. I don’t know what to say to make things better.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 125

2005-03-27T09:14:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 125

I said goodbye to Aleece, Casey and Alexander this morning. It was hard not to cry when they left. I am keeping my fingers crossed that their journey is a safe one. Casey said she would send a letter as soon as they are settled. Alexander promised to keep them safe. I wish they didn’t have to leave but I understand the need to keep Aleece safe and out of harms way. I will miss Aleece very much. For a while she was mine and in that short time I grew very attached.

The violence in town continues to escalate. I tried to go to town to simply pick up some needed supplies and barely escaped trouble. I ducked behind a corner as the Cobras chase some little kid down the street. I thought of intervening but my arm is still recovering from the blow I received at the rally. I have to pick my battles and that particular battle didn’t look very favorable. The Black Cobras are everywhere and many of them have terrible attitudes. Many Black Cobras walk around as if they were God. Not showing the proper respect can result in broken bones or worse. Keeping a low profile is essential these days.

Our attacks against the Black Cobras continue although out of plain site. Random fires have been springing up all over town against Cobra assets. Retaliation from the Black Cobras has been cruel and gruesome. I am not sure if our efforts are making any difference at all. I have been trying to get a message to Hess of the Blue Monarchs but she is nowhere to be found. She is keeping a low profile or she has left town. Today, I am not sure which.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 124

2005-03-26T01:25:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 124

The Black Cobras continue to make life hell on the Central Campus side of Lafayette BLVD. I guess I should be thankful that they are not more interested in Bear Country. Matt and Hemy have given up trying to keep Central out of Cobra hands. Matt and Hemy and several remaining tribe members from the Central Campus have moved into Bear Country.

Joshua made an offer that I almost could not refuse. He has suggested that Bear Country merge with the Spurs. If I weren’t so determined to keep Bear Country out of Black Cobra hands I would take him up on his offer. I am keeping my options open. I hope this doesn’t become necessary.

Joshua and the Spurs are not immune to Black Cobra troubles. The Black Cobras made an attempt to take over the Spurs Fort. In the early morning hours a band of Black Cobras attacked Joshua’s tribe. It was a mistake. Joshua and his tribe are well armed and well trained. The Cobras will definitely think twice before attempting to do that again.

Many of the local tribes continue to fight off the Black Cobras including Bear Country. It is difficult and many of the smaller tribes have fallen and failed at their attempts to keep the Cobras from taking over. The Black Cobras continue to increase in numbers, mostly because the smaller tribes don’t have the power to fight. The alternative is jail, death or abandoning their home.

I have sent Pete and Jonas on a mission for help. If everything goes well they should return within a week, hopefully with reinforcements.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 123

2005-03-20T06:44:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 123

Usually when I dream it’s a bunch of random events mixed up into a complicated mess that makes absolutely no sense. I had the most disturbing dream last night. Before my parents died, before the virus I went to a lake with a group of friends from my school. I went after my parents told me I couldn’t go because it was too dangerous. (The year before a student was seriously injured. We ignored the off limits sign.) Swinging out on the rope and jumping into the water was a right of passage. If you swung out far enough you would miss the branches and roots. I lied to my parents and went to the lake. We had a great day. No one was hurt. Our day was a success. So we thought. We all jumped except for Sally. She couldn’t get up the nerve to swing out on the rope. Several of the kids started calling her chicken and four eyed freak and a few other hateful names. She left crying. I forgot about her until the next day when the news said she was missing. The search for Sally lasted more than a week. She was found floating in the lake by another group of kids attempting to make the jump. I never told my parents I had been to the lake and made the jump.

In my dream, it was the same situation only the person not wanting to jump was Scat (Victor). The lake was filled with large roots. No sane person would jump. I kept trying to convince Victor that he didn’t have to jump. He finally jumped only in my dream when he made the jump we were standing on top of a building. I woke up before I saw Victor hit the ground.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 122

2005-03-19T06:05:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 122

I hate days like today, everyone crying and saying goodbye. It has been a very sad morning. Several tribe members have left Bear Country to find a safer place to live away from the Black Cobras. I hate saying goodbye. I hate seeing my friends leave. Casey and Alexander have also decided to leave Bear Country. This makes my heart hurt. They will be leaving in a few days. Casey is giving me a little time to say goodbye to Aleece. Sometimes we all have to make really hard decisions. I wish Casey didn’t have to make this one. Bear Country is her home. Little Aleece was born just down the hall. The Black Cobras have ruined a perfectly good community.

Pete and Jonas spent the day in town making life difficult for the Black Cobras. Every thing went well and they made it home safely. Things have not gone well for a couple of the other tribes. The Black Cobras have filled the jail and started retaliating against tribes caught interrupting the flow of Bliss into the community. A couple of people have been beaten and put on display.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 121

2005-03-16T23:25:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 121

I waited for ever. At least it felt like forever. A couple of days. I had almost convinced myself that I wasn’t going to get the information on where and when the meeting was going to be held. I had to make excuses about a dozen times over the last couple of days on why I couldn’t leave Bear Country. About 3 am yesterday morning I hear a knock on my door. A runner hands me a note with a destination and the word NOW! He’s gone before I could say thank you or get more information.

I arrive at the destination printed on the note only to be blindfolded and taken somewhere else after I arrived. It was an apartment somewhere. Not on the first floor. I think we went up four flights of stairs. I lost count. It’s hard to climb stairs blindfolded. The apartment was blacked out. Candles lit the room. I counted twenty people. Some of which I have never seen. Tribe leaders from a part of town I never adventure into. When we arrived we were told not to talk to each other. A few head nods were exchanged when you recognized someone. We mostly stared at each other. Hess walked into the room and said that what she had to say wasn’t up for debate. We could follow her battle plan or leave now and fight the Black Cobras on our own. Each of us was given a piece of paper with instruction on what our tribe was expected to do. Hess insisted we not share information with each other. After the meeting we were blinded folded again and returned to our original destinations.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 120

2005-03-14T05:05:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 120

I woke this morning to find a note slipped under my door. I almost didn’t see it. Lost was sleeping on top of it. The note simply said if I am interested in attending a meeting with Hess drop the blue monarch into the mail slot at 2318 Houghton St. A tiny note at the bottom of the page said further information will be revealed later. I ventured out to drop my monarch into the mail slot and then went back home to Bear Country. I guess now it’s a waiting game. I have never been good at waiting. Someone should have told Hess that this sort of thing stresses me out. I haven’t told anyone about the note. I’m not sure if I should but I have been tempted. I desperately wanted to tell Tony when I saw him this morning.

I think Tony has given up on Scat (Victor). He didn’t even mention him once at breakfast. When I asked Tony what he had planned for the day he simply said he was going to work on his project in the basement.

The library trio has been up and about today. I passed by them as they were heading out the front door. Marty said they were going out to clean up the town by removing Bliss and Black Cobra trash posted everywhere. I cautioned them to be careful. The Black cobras don’t have a sense of humor and they take it personally when you step on their tails. Gretchen and Cecilia promised me they would be careful. They wouldn’t let Marty take any unnecessary chances. I sure hope so.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 119

2005-03-12T08:32:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 119 - Podcast not available

Life in and around Bear Country continues to get more complicated. Life is spinning out of control and I don’t know how to stop the madness.

Tony is not in a good mood. He is terribly upset. Tony went to the far side of town to pick up some needed parts for his project in the basement. His journey took most of the day. On his way back to Bear Country he stopped by the jail to check on Victor. When he arrived at the jail he discovered it had been taken over by Black Cobras. Victor was dressed as a Black Cobra and he refused to return to Bear Country.

Matt and Hemy dropped by Bear Country. They were not happy. There is no longer a straight walk from the Central Campus to Bear Country. Matt and Hemy had to take the long way around, across the park and thru the arroyo. Luckily, the arroyo was empty. Their walk would have been even longer if the arroyo was filled with water. Hemy said several of the local businesses and smaller tribes on her end of Lafayette Blvd have been taken over by the Black Cobras including her favorite grocery store. The Black Cobras have even put up barriers blocking off access to several parts of town. Access is granted only if you are wearing the Black Cobra patch.

Something has to be done I am not going down without a fight.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 118

2005-03-11T00:17:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 118- Podcast not available

I was so exhausted by the time I made it back to my room I couldn’t bring myself to write in my journal. It was an interesting day yesterday. Interesting is probably not the best word to use but at the moment I can’t think of anything else. I woke up early so that I could attend the rally that I heard was going to happen. I was hoping to talk to Hess before things got too wild and crazy. I guess it wasn’t meant to be. Hess wasn’t anywhere to be found. I saw several Blue Monarchs. I even spoke to a few of them but they weren’t giving up any information on how I could locate Hess. They kept saying she would be here. It was frustrating.

The Black Cobras are increasing in numbers and their hold on the people in town is increasing. Several buildings in town had signs on the doors announcing change of management. This is not a good thing. I was walking thru town and saw someone wearing a Black Cobra patch . At first I thought it was just someone’s way of advertising they were allies with the Black Cobras, then I noticed several people were wearing them. After a little research, I discovered that you have to have a patch to enter a building under Black Cobra management.

The rally did not go well. It turned violent pretty quickly. A group of Black Cobra guards surrounded us and demanded the rally be stopped. We objected and the fight began. Most people attending the rally did not bring weapons the Cobras were all armed. It wasn’t a fair fight. I have an enormous bruise on my left arm where I was hit with a stick. My arm is not broken but at first I thought it was. I couldn’t fight after that. More Black Cobras arrived and their leader stopped the fight. We were all asked to go home or be taken into custody. Except for a few most of us went home.

After the rally, I went to the jail to see Tony and Pete. I was hoping they could help me with my arm. To my surprise the jail had been taken over by the Black Cobras. Tony was nowhere to be found and Pete was locked up in one of the cells with a couple of his deputies. Victor was not in a cell but he seemed to be very comfortable talking to the new jailers. He has gone over to the other side. I asked for Pete’s release. My request was denied but I begged and pleaded. After a couple of hours of kissing Black Cobra butt (i.e. making coffee, refilling cups, sweeping, taking out the garbage and washing windows) Pete was released from his jail cell. I wouldn’t normally have gone thru the trouble but Pete is a very valuable member of Bear Country.

We went home to Bear Country.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 117

2005-03-09T11:25:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 117- Podcast not available

I am trying really hard not to interfere. I keep trying to tell myself that their family life is none of my business. Casey and Alexander have set up house down the hall. I guess I should be thankful they are not moving away. Alexander seems nice but I keep thinking about his brother Xavier. In the couple of days I have known Alexander he has been nothing but a perfect gentleman. I have watched him treat Casey with respect and he has been very caring towards Aleece. Xavier was evil and he was a thorn in this community. I am not certain I totally trust Alexander. I realize that Alexander and Xavier are two different people. They have two different personalities but they are brothers. Could they really be total opposites?

Jonas and Lisa went to town to participate in a rally against the Black Cobras. It started out peacefully but ended in a large fight. Jonas and Lisa both came back to Bear Country with cuts and scraps. Lisa said Hess and the Blue Monarchs were there. Picketing, protesting and loudly voicing their opinions. I’m not surprised. Hess probably planned the entire rally. I wish I had gone. I wanted to talk to her again. I had hoped Hess would have stopped by Bear Country by now. Another rally is scheduled for tomorrow. I plan to go.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 116

2005-03-08T02:43:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 116- Podcast not available

After spending a little time at the jail keeping Tony and Victor company I walked out to the Spurs Fort to see Joshua. From our conversation yesterday, I wasn’t sure if he wanted me to talk to the tribe leaders alone and arrange for a tribal meeting or if he wanted to go along.

Joshua was out branding cattle and enjoying it. I think the boys and a couple of girls were having a little roping competition. Seems kind of cruel to me but Joshua said that branding was the only way he could be sure people knew that the cattle belonged to the Spurs. He must have been having a busy morning. He was covered in dirt and sweat. I don’t think I have ever seen him that dirty and he smelled like a cow. Stinky, Stinky, Stinky. And he couldn’t just say “hi”, he had to hug me, …ick!!.

I felt bad about taking Joshua away from his fun and games. He didn’t seem to mind too much but I apologized for the interruption in his play. His day probably would have been more enjoyable if he had stayed home. We went from tribe leader to tribe leader with the exception of a couple of tribes no one wanted to here our cause. It was a waste of a perfectly good afternoon.

On our way back to the Spurs Fort Joshua and I walked by the Black Cobras tribe building. There was a long line of people waiting for their daily dose. None of them looked very healthy. A few people were asleep in the gutters. Black Cobras were using sticks to encourage those unable to get up off the ground to leave. A few people had to be carted away in wheel barrels. Today would have been a good day to show Victor what this drug is doing to people. Oh well, there’s always tomorrow.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 115

2005-03-07T10:06:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 115

Scat (Victor) sits in jail. He isn’t talking to anyone especially not Tony. I dropped by to bring him some breakfast this morning. The boy is stubborn. He wouldn’t even look at me. He just stared at the corner, pretended I wasn’t there. His dinner from last night was still untouched. I feel sorry for him but I can’t help think that Tony is only doing what he thinks is best.

The Bear Country grape vine is one of the quickest ways to pass information from one person to another. The jail was actually a pretty busy place today. Victor can’t complain about not getting visitors. I imagine just about everyone in Bear Country knows he is in lockup. Several of the younger children stopped by. Pete had his deputies frisk everyone to make sure they didn’t have any “Bliss” on them.

The library trio, Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia stopped by. They offered to discuss peer pressure and the downfalls of using drugs with Victor but he wasn’t interested. Marty said they had thought about bringing a few books on the subject but then it occurred to the three of them that Victor doesn’t know how to read. I think the not knowing how to read comment hit a nerve with Victor because he tossed his glass of water at the bars drenching the three of them. Cecelia and Gretchen offered a few words of encouragement and said that they would be back in a few days to check on his progress.

Joshua from the Spurs tribe also stopped by the jail. He was actually at the jail to see me and not Victor. Joshua wanted to know if I had thought of any solutions on how to get rid of the “bliss” troubles in town. I told him I had no idea about what to do about the problem but if he had any solutions I would gladly listen. He had no solutions but suggested that we call another tribal meeting. I don’t think it would help but I said I would make the arrangements. I hope he doesn’t expect a big turn out because I don’t think we are going to get one.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 114

2005-03-05T10:44:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 114- Podcast not available

Drama and more drama. I guess it was too much to ask to have two peaceful noneventful days in a row. I was in my room in the admin hallway, sitting at my desk, staring out the window, watching the squirrels when I heard yelling and people running down the hall. I stepped out in the hall just in time to be tackled by Victor. I don’t think he was expecting me to step into his path. The both of us land on the floor. Victor starts yelling at me to get off and let go. I’m trying to get up as Tony grabs Victor by the collar. Victor struggles and tries to pull away from Tony. Pete arrives on the scene to help Tony apprehend Victor.

I’m not sure when parental responsibility ends and when you just have to raise your hands in the air and say I give up. Get out, go your own way, make your mistakes. Tony is troubled because he doesn’t know what to do. I don’t have any answers. I’m not sure what I would do in the same situation. Tony wants to save Victor from “Bliss”. Victor doesn’t want to be saved.

Tony and Pete locked Victor up in the jail temporarily for his own safety. It was a struggle to get the boy there. For a little kid he has considerable strength in his arms and legs. I think Tony plans to leave Victor in jail until the boy comes to his senses. From the attitude I saw today, I don’t think Victor is coming around to Tony’s way of thinking any time soon.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 113

2005-03-04T09:07:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 113- Podcast not available

Aleece has been returned to her mom Casey, permanently this time. Casey assures me that her days of taking chances are over. She plans to settle down and give Aleece a stable environment. I hope this is true because Aleece needs her mom. I’ll be watching.

I spent the rest of yesterday evening and most of today alone. It was nice, quiet and peaceful. I woke up at 8 o’clock this morning and for a brief moment I thought about starting my day. Then I had a thought. If someone in Bear Country needed my assistance they could just wait until later. I climbed back into bed and didn’t climb out again until almost ten. I didn’t get dressed until almost noon. Not one person stopped by or knocked on my door. I love lazy days.

After breakfast or rather lunch. I went down to the park and sat under the big oak tree and watched the ducks. I couldn’t have asked for a nicer day with no cares and no worries. I almost made myself cry when I thought about how much Aleece loved watching the ducks. I am sure Casey will bring Aleece to the park occasionally. I watched a couple of tribes on the opposite side of the lake play football. They looked like they were having a good time. Every time someone scored a touchdown you could hear people cheer and see them dance on the field.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 112

2005-03-03T00:31:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 112

I spent most of the morning pacing around Bear Country waiting for Casey’s return. I had just about given up hope when Pete sent one of the smaller children up to my room to let me know that Casey was back and that she had a friend. Pete and a couple of his deputies were keeping them both at the front entrance. I found this a little odd and I was confused. Why wouldn’t Pete let Casey in? I picked up Aleece from her cradle and went to the front of Bear Country.

I stood at the top of the stairs in utter disbelief. What was Casey thinking? Why would she bring him back here after everything he did in the past? She had to be insane. I leapt down the stairs. The first thing out of my mouth was “I want him out of Bear Country now!!” I was up in Casey face in a flash. “What the h*ll are you thinking? I can’t believe you deserted your baby to retrieve this piece of garbage.”

I said a few other things before taking a deep breath to continue with my madness. Casey grabbed the opportunity of my pause and simply said he wasn’t Xavier. Picture the room suddenly quiet. Then I laughed and handed Aleece to one of the deputies and asked him to take her up to my room. I remember thinking, Casey thinks I’m stupid. Before I had the chance to continue Casey said she could prove he’s not Xavier.

I had Pete and his deputies lock Casey and her friend in one of the supply closets. Then I sent a runner to retrieve Hemy from the Central Campus. It was more than an hour before Hemy and Matt arrived at Bear Country. In the mean time I was down stairs in the basement talking to Tony. He just sat there and listened to me rant and rave about Casey trying to make a fool out of me.

Pete opened the supply closet and the first thing out of Hemy’s mouth was “Alexander, how have you been?” Hemy looked at me and said with a smile “This is the good twin.” I had my doubts but after a few minutes of Hemy and Casey assuring me that this person standing in front of me was not Xavier but in fact his brother Alexander I had to relent and let them out of the closet.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 111

2005-03-02T05:10:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 111

I saw an old friend today. I haven’t seen her in ages. I wasn’t even sure if she was still around. I thought maybe she moved on to some place new. Apparently not, because when I went to town with Pete and Jonas, there she was standing on the top of an old broken down car protesting against the use of “Bliss”. A little deja vu. The last time I saw her standing on a car was during the mail war.

Hess is a very unique individual and the leader of the Blue Monarchs. She has a considerable amount of passion especially about causes she finds important. I have never been one to stand up on a box top and voice my opinion. Not in public anyway. In my own tribe I voice my own opinion and in tribal meetings I have been known to speak my mind. Hess is a little different. She is fearless. Hess takes on the world regardless of the danger. She lets the whole world know her opinion. I have seen Hess draw lines in the sand and dare ignorance to step over. I have a lot of respect for that.

The crowd watching Hess was a mixed crowd. There were a few hecklers but for the most part it was a peaceful protest. It stayed peaceful until a couple of Black Cobras dropped by the protest to cause trouble. They weren’t happy she was standing on top of that car protesting against their livelihood. From within the crowd the Black Cobras started throwing things at Hess. I saw a metal pole barely miss hitting Hess in the head. The crowd reacted quickly. Pete was standing next to one of the Black Cobras. I was standing next to Pete. Pete put the black cobra on the ground before he knew what was happening. The other cobra was also subdued by the crowd. There was a brief moment of uncertainty when I thought a large fight was going to develop. The Cobras were sent away with their tails between their legs. The crowd quieted down and Hess finished with her speech.

It was good to see her again. Pete, Jonas and I invited Hess back to Bear Country for dinner. She said she was a little busy but that she would stop by sometime soon when she had a little free time.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 110

2005-02-28T23:56:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 110

Aleece is a sleep. I have been sitting at my desk for more than an hour thinking about Tony and Scat (Victor). I’m not sure when I jumped over the line from being a child to thinking I was grown. If my parents were still a live I would still be considered a child. I would be expected to live by and follow their rules. My parents aren’t alive and I set my own rules. I live my life the way I want.

Victor wants to live by his own rules. He wants to live his life the way he wants to. Tony believes that he has the responsibility to make sure that Victor grows up to lead a happy healthy life. Victor is still a little boy. He still hasn’t reached his teenage years. Tony has established a set of rules for Victor to follow and until recently Victor hasn’t had much of a problem following those rules. Victor has become extremely defiant. Tony has his hands full. I am not certain if Tony is going to be able to control Victor for much longer. And technically, there is nothing forcing Victor to follow Tony’s rule. There is no family connection, not a real one.

Victor snuck out of the basement and went to the Black Cobras. Tony caught up to him before he actually had the opportunity to enter the Black Cobras tribe building. Luckily, the line to get in was extremely long. Tony drugged Victor back to Bear Country kicking and screaming. It was not a pretty site. I haven’t been to the basement but I have a feeling Victor is probably tied to a chair or some stable object.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 109

2005-02-27T23:49:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 109

My life is full of stress and more stress. Maybe I should reconsider who I hang out with. When I went to bed last night I was alone. I woke up this morning to find Aleece in my room. I was having a dream and in my dream I heard a baby cry. I was looking everywhere for the baby and I couldn’t find it. I was in this building and that building, down by the lake and roaming the halls of Bear Country. I don’t know what exactly made me wake up but when I did Aleece was in my room crying. I picked up Aleece and went down to the cafeteria to get her a bottle because Casey didn’t think to leave me any. I think I spent most of the morning pissed and angry. I ran into Pete in the cafeteria. He asked me if I was having a bad day. I just glared at him probably with an evil expression on my face and continued making Aleece her bottle. Then I ran into Tony, Lisa and Jonas on my way back to my room. They were discussing something. I don’t know what. Tony asks if I needed some help. I simply said “NO” rather abruptly and kept on walking. I laid Aleece in her cradle to get a drink of water from the sink because I forgot to get my self something when I was down stairs. I looked in the mirror and had a terrible fright. My hair was a mess. It was sticking up all over my head and then I realized that I had been down stairs without a robe on. I was just wearing my gown.

Aleece was cranky and cried most of the morning. Mid morning Aleece decides she needs a nap and I lay her back down in the crib. I see the note Casey left me. I don’t know why I didn’t see it earlier. The note didn’t make me feel any better.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 108

2005-02-26T10:10:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 108

I attended a tribal meeting with several of the local tribe leaders. It shouldn’t be a surprise but the local leaders are split on the “Bliss” issue. The meeting was loud, noisy and violent. I left with an excruciating headache and a sore hand from punching one of the other tribal leaders. In my defense, he swung at me first. All I said was that “Bliss” was going to shrink his already little brain. Nothing was accomplished except to draw definite lines between those who think “Bliss” is a menace and those who think “Bliss” is just a recreational drug that helps make life tolerable.

“Bliss” posters have been posted all over town encouraging its use. I was so angry after the meeting that I tore down several posters on my way back to Bear Country. To make matters even worse, as I was walking through the center of town I noticed A tribe called the Black Cobras handing out free samples of “Bliss” to anyone who wanted to try it.

In only a couple of days the little Bliss Kiosks has grown into an entire building with Black Cobra guards posted out front. Apparently, you have to be a member to enter. The line to get in was half way down the block.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 107

2005-02-25T10:24:00.000-08:00

Journal entry 107 - Podcast not available

I hate it when days go badly. Today was awful. The people of Bear Country have had their share of arguments. I’m wondering if a full moon is expected tonight or sometime within the next day or two. I had an argument with Casey. I think everyone in Bear Country heard us yelling at each other. I didn’t even realize how loud our discussion had become until we started to draw a crowd. People already think I have gone over the deep end. My credibility as a tribe leader is dwindling fast.

I heard Jonas and Lisa having a dispute as I was passing thru the theater to the green house to get some bell peppers. They were standing in the balcony seats. Lisa was yelling at Jonas to mind his business. Jonas was trying to get her to listen to reason. They quit yelling when the theater door slammed shut behind me. I passed thru to the other side as quickly as possible. I have my own problems and didn’t want to get involved in theirs.

Pete and one of his deputies found a couple of the younger children; including Victor buying “Bliss” behind the cafeteria. I am thinking that the drug dealer selling the “Bliss” is going to think twice before coming around Bear Country again. Providing Pete and his deputies let him out of jail anytime soon. Pete put Victor and his little friends in jail for a couple of hours to teach them a lesson.

Tony was furious when he heard Victor was trying to buy “Bliss”. I have seen Tony angry. It’s not very pretty. He was past angry today. I kind of felt sorry for Victor. Tony said tomorrow he is taking Victor to the center of town to show them what happens to people when they get hooked on drugs. It shouldn’t be too hard to find someone. Victor is grounded to the basement until further notice. I don’t think parole is in the near future.

Madie

2 Responses

Dorothy Stahlnecker says:

February 18, 2010 at 7:11 am

My first visit, I’ll be back.

Dorothy form grammology
grammology.com
Dorothy Stahlnecker´s last blog ..Death of an Olympian on Network TV: Too Far?

Marsha Loftis says:

February 18, 2010 at 8:39 am

@Dorothy, Thanks for stopping by.

MLBC: Journal Entry 106

2005-02-22T23:36:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 106

Casey returned to Bear Country sometime in the middle of the night. She didn’t even drop in my room to get Aleece. On the way down to breakfast Aleece and I stopped by Casey’s room. Casey was sleeping on her bed, still in her clothes. She looked as if she had crawled thru a swamp. For a brief moment, I thought of waking her up. A large pitcher of ice water would do it. I changed my mind; I didn’t want Aleece to see me yell at her mom.

Down at breakfast Aleece and I ran into Tony and Scat. Tony was making pancakes. I asked him “what was the occasion.” He said he was just in the mood. While eating breakfast Scat informed us that he didn’t want to be called Scat. He wanted to be called “Victor.” Tony and I looked at each other. It was one of those moments when you are not sure what to say. I asked Scat why Victor. He said it was what his brother used to call him. I didn’t even know Scat had a brother and apparently neither did Tony. The both of us, in unison said “You have a brother?” Scat (Victor) said he had a big brother named Price and that he was part of a bike tribe called the Devils of Lancaster. Victor said his brother was going to come back for him when he got bigger and could be initiated into the tribe. Tony found Scat on our door step dirty and hungry. He had no idea that Scat was dropped off at Bear Country by his big brother. I had no idea. Another mystery solved.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 105

2005-02-21T01:02:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 105

Aleece and I spent the rest of the evening at the Spurs Campsite with Joshua. We didn’t do much of anything except for sit around and talk and eat great food. Aleece spent the evening being passed from one person to another. I think she had a great time. What baby wouldn’t enjoy all that attention?

It was dark before it occurred to me that Aleece and I should probably head back to Bear Country. Joshua offered to walk us back. I took him up on the offer. Although, I was tempted to stay at the Spurs Campsite until the morning. The only thing that kept me from doing that was I wasn’t sure exactly when Casey would be returning. I didn’t tell her we were going to spend the day with Joshua. I didn’t want her to panic when she realized we weren’t in Bear Country.

The walk back was nice until we got to the center of town. People were huddled around fire barrels. Nothing unusual about that until you noticed their drunken stupor, odd behavior and irritability. There were fights happening everywhere. How could I be so blind and not realize the extent of the “Bliss” problem. If this many people are using the drug? Why didn’t I notice before? Joshua was just as surprised. There was even a Kiosk with the words “Bliss” in big letters on the front selling the drug.

We passed thru the center of town as quickly as possible. I don’t think I breathed until Bear Country was in site. I thanked Joshua for walking us home. I offered him a place to stay for the night. He declined. He said he needed to return to the Spurs.

I tucked Aleece into bed and went looking for Casey. I couldn’t find her anywhere in Bear Country. No one I asked had seen her all day.

Madie

2 Responses

debbie says:

February 9, 2010 at 5:10 pm

Oh my. That is scary.

debbie´s last blog ..Playing Games

Marsha Loftis says:

February 10, 2010 at 7:08 am

@debbie, a little scary maybe..but Madie has seen worse.

I will get back to this on the Weekend, my oldest daughter and grandbaby are in town.

MLBC: Journal Entry 104

2005-02-19T02:54:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 104

Casey once again left on her trip thru the bad part of town to see her undisclosed friend. I asked where she was going and whom was she seeing. She said it wasn’t any of my business. I am trying hard not to be noisy but curiosity and concern for Aleece has me a little suspicious. I guess I should be happy that she asks me to take care of Aleece while she is away.

Aleece , Lost and I traveled out to the Spurs Campsite to see Joshua. They have really built things up out there. They have fenced in a large part of the area where the cattle are grazing and have put up several buildings. Joshua said they have more plans for construction. He plans to build an entire fort. I can’t wait to see it. I guess this means they plan to stay for a long time. I’m glad because I like Joshua he is a good leader.

After lunch, Aleece and I accompanied Joshua to town for supplies. Everything was going well until we decided to stop for a drink at one of the local bars. We were sitting at a comfortable table, enjoying our drinks and having a nice conversation when three men dressed in black walked into the bar. They demanded to see the proprietor. The proprietor came out and invited the men to the back room. Joshua and I looked at each. Should we leave, should we stay? I need to learn to make decisions more quickly. Just as we were getting ready to pay our tab the proprietor was hurled back thru the door. He crashed into the tables on the other side of the room.

I picked up Aleece and Joshua paid the tab. All I heard was “We want the drugs or payment.” We were half way down the street a minute later.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 103

2005-02-17T05:46:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 103

Apparently, people object to being told what they can or cannot do with their lives. I try to be a good leader but sometimes it seems I jump the gun and forget that other people have opinions. With that said, I held a meeting to discuss “Bliss” with everyone that lives in Bear Country. Most people attended. Pete discussed the proposed no drug use policy inside of Bear Country. Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia gave a wonderful talk on the pitfalls of using drugs. The journal club helped by making the fliers and pictures for the presentation. It seems I prematurely banned the use of “Bliss” inside of Bear Country. I was so caught up in the illegal drug issue that it didn’t occur to me that I should take a vote.

The citizen of Bear Country voted to:
1. Ban the use of “Bliss” inside of Bear Country.
2. Anyone caught using “Bliss” inside of Bear Country will be asked to stop their use.
3. If they can not stop using “Bliss” they will be asked to leave Bear Country.
4. Anyone caught selling “Bliss” inside of Bear Country will be asked to leave immediately.

Casey made it back to Bear Country safely. I still do not know who she went to see or why.

Madie

6 Responses

write-brained says:

February 3, 2010 at 8:45 am

New here! Intrigued. Off to listen to the podcast…
write-brained´s last blog ..Robert + Jacket + Dead = Search me

Marsha Loftis says:

February 3, 2010 at 9:26 am

@write-brained, Welcome, I hope you enjoy your stay.

B. Trahn says:

February 3, 2010 at 11:51 am

Thanks Marsha,

Trahn tacked up the sign at the top of his door. With any luck at all his business of selling Bliss will bring in lots of cash.

Blond Duck says:

February 3, 2010 at 3:57 pm

I often dance in my dreams.
Blond Duck´s last blog ..The Return of Miss Pickles 17

Amy says:

February 3, 2010 at 6:53 pm

Thanks for stopping by my blog the other day. I hope you have a wonderful evening..
Amy ´s last blog ..Snow White…

Marsha Loftis says:

February 4, 2010 at 7:21 am

@Amy, you are welcome and thanks for stopping by mine.

MLBC: Journal Entry 102

2005-02-16T05:20:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 102

Aleece is spending the entire day with me. Casey left early this morning on her little journey thru the bad part of town to see her undisclosed friend. She said she would be home by nightfall. I hope Casey knows what she is doing. I have this awful feeling that something bad is going to happen. She is being extremely secretive. I asked Tony if he knew what was going on with Casey. He said he didn’t have a clue.

Matt and Hemy dropped by my room. They are doing well and look so incredibly happy. I think I am somewhat envious. Hemy says things are going well at Central with one exception. Someone is distributing drugs and not the good kind that cures illnesses. Twice this week Matt stumbled across some sad looking individual in the Park next to the Central Campus obviously strung out on something.

I was just getting ready to say that I haven’t seen any drug use near Bear Country, when Pete walked up and interrupted. He said that the use of drugs is becoming a problem in the community. The sellers are calling this drug. “Bliss”. To my surprise the locker incident yesterday was actually Pete interrupting a sale of “Bliss” inside Bear Country.

There are no laws in place forbidding the use of illegal drugs. Even if there were any such laws it would be difficult to enforce. The local tribes have their own codes of conduct. I have asked the journal club to put up fliers inside Bear Country. Anyone caught using “Bliss” inside Bear Country will have to find a new place to live. Hemy and Matt will be placing similar fliers inside the Central Campus. Out of concern for the local community I plan to visit a few of the other tribes in town and ask for their support against “Bliss”. If enough tribes ban the use of “bliss” perhaps we can stop this from becoming too much of a problem.

Madie

4 Responses

B. Trahn says:

February 2, 2010 at 11:17 am

Marsha, I am enjoying your diary. Some of the podcast are a little soft and hard to hear without headphones. Will you be podcasting the middle entries anytime soon?

Marsha Loftis says:

February 2, 2010 at 11:19 am

Sorry about the podcasts. I am using new equipment and it has taken a little while for me to figure everything out. I will podcast the other entries as soon as I can.

Alice in Wonderland says:

February 2, 2010 at 7:41 pm

I have just started reading your journal, and I just adore your lay-out!

Thank you so much for stopping by and leaving me a comment!

I will have to listen in to some of your podcasts, but living in England, I’m usually late or too early!

Marsha Loftis says:

February 2, 2010 at 8:44 pm

@Alice in Wonderland, Thanks for stopping by and thanks for the praise. I hope you stop by again. I will drop by your site on occasion too!

MLBC: Journal Entry 101

2005-02-15T06:18:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 101

It’s been a lazy day. I haven’t done much of anything. I did take Lost for a walk. A short walk, once around the block. Nothing important to discuss about Bear Country. Although, I did round a corner earlier today on my way to the cafeteria for grilled cheese and see Pete slam someone up against a locker. I asked if I could be of assistance. Pete said “No” rather abruptly “..problem solved!” Pete looked as if he had things under control. The locker ornament looked as if he was getting Pete’s message loud and clear. I didn’t want to intrude so I went back the way I had come. I am curious about what the dispute was about. I didn’t recognize the person being slammed against the lockers. Oh well, the next time I see Pete I will ask him what the fight was about.

Casey said she needed to go on a small trip tomorrow to see an old friend. The journey would take her thru the bad part of town and she didn’t want to take Aleece along. I asked “what friend?” Casey said he was just a friend. I didn’t know him. I asked if it was Xavier. Casey looked at me as if I was crazy. She said that if I didn’t want to watch Aleece just say so. She would get someone else. I agreed to watch Aleece. I hope Casey knows what she is doing. The last time she went on a little trip she disappeared for a couple of months.

Madie

3 Responses

Blond Duck says:

February 1, 2010 at 5:49 pm

It sounds adventurous to me!

Marilyn says:

February 1, 2010 at 7:53 pm

adventurous indeed!
Marilyn´s last blog ..Farm Report

Marsha Loftis says:

February 1, 2010 at 8:26 pm

@Blond Duck and Marilyn, – thanks for stopping by ladies and thanks for leaving comments.

MLBC: Journal Entry 100

2005-02-14T03:47:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 100

The nightmare I had last night was extremely disturbing. I dreamt I was back in Mathias’s jail. Mathias, Xavier and Casey were on the outside of the jail cell laughing at me. Aleece was also on the outside of the jail cell but she was in a crib with a bottle just out of her reach. I was trying to reach thru the cell bars to give it to her but my arms wouldn’t reach. She was crying so hard. I was begging and begging for Mathias, Xavier and Casey to help me. They just laughed and laughed.

I woke up crying, my heart was racing so hard I thought it was going to explode. I sat up in bed, no bars, no jail cell. Where was Aleece? I started to panic, and then I remembered that Aleece was with Casey down the hall. I jumped out of bed, grabbed my robe and headed down the admin hallway to Casey’s room. I didn’t knock; I just went in and picked up Aleece. Casey was a little startled to find me in her room. I must have looked dreadful because she asked me if I was alright. I hugged Aleece tight and simply said “I’m fine,.. bad dream.”

Casey didn’t try to take Aleece away from me. She let me hug Aleece until I had finished. Casey invited me down to the cafeteria for a cup of tea. We ran into Tony on the way. He keeps some weird hours. We all had a nice conversation. Tony and I filled Casey in on everything that happened while she was away. It was probably about 4:30 when we decided to go back to bed. I gave Aleece back to Casey. Tony walked me back to my room.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 99

2005-02-13T00:10:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 99

People walked around in a daze for a couple of days. I think everyone was in shock. The explosion at 400 Mason St caught everyone by surprise. There are always casualties in a war but I don’t think we were expecting the amount of casualties that occurred because of the explosion. For the next week, the local tribes buried their dead.

Bear Country was lucky, no one from our tribe died. Was it luck or fate? I don’t know. Pete and I were actually headed toward the building when it exploded. I was knocked off my feet and thrown backwards. I hit my head on one of the big blue mailboxes. Pete sustained minor injuries. A couple cuts and bruises. Matt and Jonas were off fighting somewhere out of my view. I was glad to see the both of them walking up the street after the explosion. For a while, I wasn’t sure if they had made it inside the building before it exploded.

With the war stopped Hess and the Blue Monarchs set out to organize meetings between the local tribe leaders. These meetings were intended to solve several issues in the community that were causing difficulties. I think the meetings help, although a couple of the meetings I attended actually began and ended with fists fights. Most of the local tribes are a part of some tribal association. We don’t always get along but we are making an honest attempt at rebuilding society.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 98

2005-02-12T07:26:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 98

I knew it was going to be a bad day. I woke up that morning with a feeling of dread. By the time I made it to town with Matt, Jonas and Pete, that evening, a fight was already in progress. Tribe USA and Tribe UPS were in a battle to the death. I don’t know who started the fight but I had heard rumors that Tribe USA was going to attempt to take over Tribe UPS’s mail depot.

Hess and the Blue Monarchs were doing their best to stop the fight but no one was listening. The number of people participating in the fight quickly grew in spite of their efforts. The news of the battle quickly spread thru out the community. By nightfall, nearly every tribe in town was participating in the fight. The wounded were everywhere.

Hess and the Blue Monarchs continued their efforts of trying to stop the fight even though several members of their tribe had been seriously injured during the battle. People were out of control. Rage and hate took over that day.

The number of people actually inside 400 Mason St is still a mystery. The explosion was unexpected. A lot of people died including most of the members from Tribe USA and Tribe UPS. The explosion was so large that nearly everyone in the street was knocked off his or her feet. I would not be surprised if the casualties on the street equaled the number of casualties inside the building. The explosion stopped the fighting. The cause of the explosion is unknown but people have speculated that it was a gas leak.

After things had calmed down, Hess jumped on top of a broken down truck and told everyone to go home. She said our parents would not be proud of what we had become. She was right. We gathered our dead and wounded and went home.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 97

2005-02-11T01:55:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 97

The violence against the mail carriers intensified. The fights between the different tribes became more destructive and violent. Day in and Day out the streets were filled with people protesting and chanting. It didn’t take much for the protest and chants to turn into violent encounters among the different tribes. Walking on the streets was increasingly risky.

It saddens me to think about how the people living inside Bear Country got caught up in the violence. I got caught up in the violence. Matt, Jonas, Pete and I held rallies and protest against Tribe USA. We fought against other tribes who spoke badly against Tribe UPS. Are lives became consumed with proving that Tribe UPS was in the right and that Tribe USA was responsible for all our troubles.

Not everyone was caught up in the violence there was one tribe that was totally against the war. Hess was the leader of the blue monarchs. Hess and the blue monarchs were in the streets daily trying to get people to put down their weapons and talk things out. Not a lot of people seemed interested in what she had to say.

Hess and the blue monarchs dropped by Bear Country on one evening. Hess was making an attempt at getting the tribal leaders to meet and discuss the mail war issues. I agreed to attend the meeting. Unfortunately, the gathering of the local tribe leaders would happen too late to avoid a major catastrophe.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 96

2005-02-09T23:44:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 96

The wearing of colors to support the mail carriers was suddenly the thing to do. And I have to admit that people in Bear Country took up this ritual. Tribe UPS delivered our mail. I knew most of the carriers and they were good people. As far as I was concerned the propaganda about the Tribe UPS carriers was all false. They weren’t capable of the atrocities they were accused of.

Billboards and signs began to appear all over town. “Support Tribe UPS” “Support Tribe USA” “Tribe UPS carriers steal your mail.” “Tribe USA wants to control your life” the billboards were everywhere and most of them had hate messages. Local businesses began to support either Tribe USA or Tribe UPS. If you wore the wrong color you weren’t allowed to enter. This began to make getting food and then necessities of life difficult. Friends began to argue with each other. Fights were breaking out all over town.

Protest rallies began to popup all over town. Protesters for Tribe USA and Tribe UPS would purposely schedule their rallies to be next to each other. It was a race to see who could get the most people to attend and yell the loudest at the opposing tribe. I attended some of these rallies. I barely escaped serious injury on more than one occasion.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 95

2005-02-09T00:36:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 95

I don’t have all the details of the mail war and this is only my recollection of what happened. The squirmishes between Tribe USA and Tribe UPS began small. At first, no one realized that there was even a problem. A couple of mail carriers had their mail bags stolen. This was one of the first efforts to keep the mail from being delivered. Tribe USA and Tribe UPS responded by sending their mail carriers out in teams instead of single mail carriers. This declined the number of stolen mail bags.

It didn’t matter what side of Pass Road you were from, if you were a mail carrier people worshipped you. People began to volunteer to be mail carriers. The more mail carriers there were the more locations could be covered. The tribe leaders from both tribe USA and tribe UPS both set their goals to cover a majority of the surrounding areas. A few other tribes attempted to set up mail depots to cover the surrounding mail routes but they were quickly put out of business. The mail kiosks were burnt down or the proprietor was beaten to discourage mail delivery at that particular location.

The mail carrier occupation was suddenly an extremely dangerous job to hold. People began to take sides with either Tribe USA or Tribe UPS. Small bands of sympathizers set out to destroy the opposing tribe’s mail carriers. Propaganda was spread detailing the awful deeds of Tribe USA and Tribe UPS. Fights suddenly became common place over which tribe was the actual victims in the mail war.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 94

2005-02-08T02:36:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 94

Tribal wars are a fact of life. They occur probably on a daily basis. Not so much around Bear Country but the farther away you get the more likely you will stumble into something dangerous. Most of the conflicts are small but occasionally things get out of hand. The conflicts occur because two or more tribes want to have control over something, the block, the local grocery or the mail route. The list of conflicts and the reasons for those conflicts could fill an entire encyclopedia. We try to avoid conflicts these days by forming Tribe Associations. Local tribe leaders join associations to work out their problems. Of course, sometimes the different Tribe Associations have conflicts and difficulties.

Lost and I were on our walk yesterday and we stumbled across a burned out building. 400 Mason St used to be a Mail Depot. That fire took a lot of lives. Mail carriers are a unique breed. They take their jobs and their positions in the community very seriously. The mail war was the largest tribal war to take place in this area. This war didn’t just involve the mail carriers it involved everyone in the community. Tribe USA and Tribe UPS both wanted complete control over the local mail routes.

In the beginning after the virus mail delivery wasn’t possible until a couple of tribes decided to start mail depots. At first, delivery just occurred in the local area. If you lived on one side of Pass road, Tribe USA delivered your mail. If you lived on the other side of Pass road, Tribe UPS delivered your mail. Everything was going well. Getting mail became one of those special occasions that you looked forward to. People started writing mail to other people just so that they would get mail in return. The mail carriers continued to expand their businesses.

A tribal war began between Tribe USA and Tribe UPS when a letter was innocently delivered to the wrong mail depot. A tribe USA carrier delivered a letter to a tribe on the Tribe UPS’s side of Pass road. The Tribe UPS leader got angry that his turf was being invaded by the Tribe USA mail carriers. The war that occurred after that innocent mail delivery was deadly.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 93

2005-02-06T07:07:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 93

I slept in late. Joshua dropped by to see me. He said he heard thru the grape vine that Aleece’s mom had returned to Bear Country and that I was having a hard time. I hate the grape vine. All of Bear Country probably thinks I am off my rocker. Joshua was sweet. He gave me a hug and asked if there was anything he could do for me. I assured him that I would be fine and that I didn’t need anything except for diversion to keep my mind off the events from the last couple of days. He invited me out to the Spurs Campsite. I told him I would think about it.

Marty, Gretchen and Cecelia are a very unique couple. Rarely seen but informative. They dropped by shortly after Joshua left. They were on their way to Casey’s room. Marty asked for the books back that they had lent me. I forgot I had the child rearing books. Cecelia thought Casey would have more use of them. Gretchen agreed. Those three are odd, helpful at times but odd. Just a thought but Gretchen and Cecelia are looking very plump. Those two are either eating very well or….. I’m thinking that Marty is a very lucky man.

Pete our local sheriff also dropped by. He generously offered to leave a guard outside my door. Just in case I didn’t want to be disturbed. I declined his offer. There is already a rumor going around that I am mentally stressed. A guard outside my door would just make things worse.

Matt and Hemy invited me to dinner at the Central Campus. I took a rain check for another day. They didn’t look as if they needed my company. The offer for dinner came between intense moments of PDA(public displays of affection). They haven’t finished with their honeymoon yet.

I think Lost and I will go for a walk.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 92

2005-02-05T00:39:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 92

It’s 2:00am and I can’t sleep. Tony is asleep on the couch. Too bad I don’t have a camera because he is adorable lying there. My room has been cleared of everything that belonged to Aleece. Casey moved back into her room down the hall. I should be grateful that they are not farther away. Casey has generously said that I could watch and play with Aleece whenever I wanted. I should be thankful she is allowing me to see Aleece at all. If Casey had behaved the way I acted. I would be holding a long time grudge. I don’t think I will offer to watch Aleece for a while. I need a clean break from being her mom but I plan to keep my eyes on the both of them for a while. With the exception of saying goodbye to my parents when they died , giving Aleece back to her mother was the hardest thing I have ever done.

Tony has been such a good friend. He spent the entire evening in my room. I owe him a couple of new shirts. I haven’t cried this much since the virus took my parents. I asked Tony to give me a baby. He declined. I asked why not and he said he had already been down that road before and it didn’t have a happy ending. I didn’t know. Tony arrived at Bear Country long after we had already established our tribe.

After the virus Tony and his girlfriend Amanda, a cheerleader here at Bear Country moved in together and set up house in Tony’s family home. Soon afterward Amanda discovered she was going to have a baby. Everything was going well. Tony said they were happy and couldn’t wait for their baby to arrive. Amanda suddenly became sick and went into premature labor. The baby, a little boy was born early and died within a day. Amanda died a couple of days later. Tony moved into Bear Country a few days after that.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 91

2005-02-04T09:41:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 91

Tony and Casey stood outside my door and knocked for a couple of hours. The knocking was making me insane. Casey’s crying was making me insane. I couldn’t take one more knock or one more “please let us in”. I considered jumping out the window and running away. But I was too high up. I unlocked the door.

Casey stepped into my room. I tried to ignore her by making myself busy. Casey stood there crying. She asked if Aleece was getting big, and did she have any hair? She said she missed her deeply. She thanked me for taking care of Aleece while she was away. I turned around to face Casey and snapped. “How dare you abandon that sweet little baby and then come back here and expect me to give her back.” Casey tried to tell me she didn’t abandon Aleece. I yelled for her to get out of my room. I told her she wasn’t getting Aleece back. Casey ran out of my room sobbing. I didn’t care. I was in the right and she was in the wrong.

Tony stepped into my room next. He was calm and spoke quietly. He said he understood my concern. I stood there staring out the window. I didn’t want to hear what he was saying. I asked him to please go away. I wasn’t giving Aleece back. Tony said I had to give her back. She wasn’t mine. He said I didn’t know the whole story. Tony stepped up behind me and put his arms around me. I was trying not to cry. Tony quietly spoke into my ear that Casey was sold into slavery by Mathias. She spent more than a week in his jail. She was finally sold to a tribe that needed people to dig tunnels and excavate ore. I turned around and cried into his shoulder. I didn’t want to give her back.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 90

2005-02-02T23:13:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 90

I’ve locked myself in my room. The day began ordinarily. Aleece and I woke up early. We ate breakfast and then I read Aleece a little bit of Winnie the Pooh. I was feeling happy and alive. I decided to share my happiness. We went down to the basement to see Tony and asked if he and Scat wanted to go to the Park. Tony declined our invitation. He said that today was the day Scat was going to begin his lessons on reading and writing. Scat didn’t look to happy about the idea. He was sitting at a table in the corner sulking and mumbling how learning to read was dumb and a waste of time. I assured Scat that it was not a waste of time. Reading and writing would some day keep someone from taking advantage of him. Tony said that if Scat finished with his lessons they would meet us at the park later. I could work with that. Aleece and I trotted happily to the Park.

Aleece and I walked around the lake, looked at the ducks and watched Lost chase squirrels. No one was under the big Oak tree so I spread out a blanket. It was a beautiful day, sunny with a slight breeze. I was getting ready to give Aleece her midmorning bottle when I heard Scat yelling my name. My first thought was that somehow Tony had gotten hurt. I stood up and yelled back at him “What’s wrong? From halfway across the park Scat yells back that Casey is home. At first, I wasn’t sure if I heard him correctly. Then panic struck. Casey is home! I have to give Aleece back! Scat finally reached the oak tree. I tried to sound excited about her coming home. I asked Scat to run back to Bear Country and tell everyone that I would be back in a little while. I needed to make a quick stop and pick up some formula. I didn’t have anymore in my room.

My heart was beating out of my chest and my mind was racing. I had to figure out what to do and I only had a few moments to come up with a plan. It took me a little more than an hour to return to Bear Country. Casey and Tony met me at the front door of the school. Casey looked a little sad when she saw that I didn’t have Aleece. Casey and Tony both asked simultaniously “Where is Aleece?” My good day had turned into a bad day. I looked at Casey and calmly said that she was at a friend’s place. Tony grabbed me by the arm and asked “What Friend?” I didn’t answer. I left the both of them standing there and went straight up to my room. I can’t tell them where she is. I won’t give Aleece back over to the woman that abandoned her.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 89

2005-02-02T02:13:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 89 - Podcast not available

Our shopping spree at the plaza was interesting if not somewhat disturbing. Our shopping adventure started out normally. We went from one Kiosk to another looking for baby shoes. Didn’t find shoes but we did find a couple of other interesting finds. One of the kiosks had a set of Nancy Drew Mysteries. I always wanted to read those but the proprietor of the kiosks wasn’t about to sell one book at time. That’s just stupid because I can’t think of one person inside Bear Country that can afford to purchase more than one book at a time. I do have another option. The library trio may have those books already in the media center.

So we continue on our journey of looking for baby shoes. I think I spot a pair of shoes and zigzag thru the crowd toward the kiosk. A biker barely misses running over Aleece and I. He was in a rush and didn’t even stop and apologize. He was wearing a helmet so tracking him down and smacking him upside his head later isn’t an option of retaliation. The shoes I spot are entirely too big for Aleece’s feet.

Tony, Scat, Aleece and I continue shopping. Tony spots a snow cone kiosk. I haven’t had a snow cone since before the virus. It used to be such a treat. We purchase three snow cones. One for me, one for Tony and one for Scat. I think we paid way too much for them but we were out to have a good time. I’m eating my snow cone and sharing a couple pieces of ice with Aleece. The biggest, ugliest, yellow and black bumble bee lands on my snow cone. Not expecting a bug of that magnitude I drop my snow cone. If Aleece hadn’t been in the carrier attached to my chest I would have dropped her too. I said a couple of words that I won’t repeat. (Hopefully, Aleece won’t remember those words.) Tony generously shares his remaining snow cone with me.

Our journey to find baby shoes continued. Sometimes there is that one moment in time when you suddenly realize that maybe you should have stayed home for the day. Scat is running all over everywhere and Tony and I are trying to keep up and still keep our eyes open for baby shoes. Scat locates kiosks selling electric cars and they have batteries that actually work. He is jumping up and down begging Tony for the car. Tony is trying to explain that he can’t afford it. I step out of the way and lean against the building. Aleece is getting bigger by the day and I have a slight backache. Tony is trying to tactfully handle his problem with Scat. Out of nowhere, from above, someone tosses a TV out of a window and it falls within a couple of feet from where Aleece and I are leaning. Pieces of TV fly in every direction. Suddenly silence as everyone stops to stare. We weren’t hurt but I got a major adrenaline rush. I look at Tony. He looks at me. My feet are stuck. I can’t move. Suddenly I feel light headed and slump to the ground. I decided to find shoes another day because obviously someone didn’t want me to be at the plaza.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 88

2005-02-01T03:18:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 88- Podcast not available

I spent the morning playing with Aleece and thinking about my childhood. I was thinking mostly about my father. He was a good man and made my life incredibly interesting. He never let a learning opportunity pass. I miss those unexpected lessons. For example one day when I was about seven years old my father and I were driving to the Home Depot to pick up a new faucet for my mother. My mom loved to redecorate. Anyway, A hooker was soliciting customers on the corner. My father stops the car and points. “That is a hooker.” I remember thinking. “Ok, what is a hooker?” My father gave me a little speech about hookers and how it wasn’t an occupation I should consider. I am not certain if he actually said what a hooker did for a living but I remember staring out the window and thinking “that is one ugly woman” and “she must be really cold.”

In memory of my father, I have been teaching Aleece little life lessons. I realize she is a little small to remember anything I tell her but she looks at me as if she is really listening. I have been trying not to let her forget about her mom Casey. I tell Aleece that her mom will return soon and I show Aleece her mom’s picture. Sometimes I am not sure if I am doing this for Aleece’s benefit or for mine. If Casey comes back tomorrow I will have to give Aleece back to her mom. I find myself hoping she doesn’t return. I have gotten deeply attached.

Aleece and I are meeting Tony and Scat later. We are going to go shopping for baby shoes and a few other things. Aleece is becoming mobile. She hasn’t started crawling but she does lift herself up to her hands. She hasn’t been able to get to her knees but I don’t think it will be long. I don’t want to her scrap her little toes when she does begin to crawl.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 87

2005-01-30T01:06:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 87

Our journey home began yesterday morning. I said goodbye to Yates and to baby David. I wished them well. Yates joked that I could stay if I wanted to. He said he would make it worth my while. Movie night was coming up and they were playing the Lion King and serving lots of popcorn. I was so tempted to stay a couple more days. I haven’t seen a movie since before the virus. I politely declined but said that I would take him up on his offer another day.

Emily has decided to stay behind. It was a shock to all of us but I think she likes her new husband and her new life at Fort Shasta. We all hugged her goodbye and wished her and her new husband well. The rest of us got in the truck. I said goodbye to Yates one more time. He said there was a surprise waiting for us at the entrance.

To our surprise Tony, Jonas, Matt and Joshua were waiting for us. Yates had a sent a couple of soldiers to Bear Country to pick them up. Even though Pete was with us at the lodge he was back at Bear Country taking care of business and unable to attend our reunion. Hemy didn’t even wait for the truck to stop before she jumped out into the arms of Matt. Lisa hugged Jonas, I hugged Tony and Kate hugged her brother Joshua. It was a tearful reunion. The guys were very excited to see us. Tony said they tried to figure out where we had been taken but kept coming up with dead ends. Tony said they traveled to a place named Alexandria City. He said they talked to several merchants and a man named Mathias but no one new anything or even admitted to seeing us. After a couple of days they went back home to Bear Country. Mathias needs to pray that I never run into him again. I told Tony he was the slave trader that sold us.

On our journey home I told Tony my side of the story. I told him about our night in Mathias’ jail, being sold to Yates and Aleece being taken from me to be sold to another tribe. I also told Tony that we had no idea weather they were dead or alive. As we were driving home I asked if we could stop by the lodge. I have been thinking about the mom and baby that died there. The emotional trauma of having Aleece taken from me by Mathias left me with the need to correct the tragedy at the lodge. No one objected. We stopped and buried the baby and her mom together in a simple grave. We were getting ready to leave when Matt and Hemy disappeared into one of the cabins. No one had the heart to disturb them.
I stayed awake and talked to Tony almost the whole night. I couldn’t sleep. I was afraid someone would sneak up and take us for a second time.

We finally arrived home to Bear Country. It felt so good to be back. Pete arranged for a welcome back party. It was a lot of fun. Now I am sitting in my room in the admin hallway watching Aleece sleep. It feels so good to be back. I won’t be leaving Bear Country again anytime soon.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 86

2005-01-28T10:14:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 86

Yates kept his word. My time at Fort Shasta is ending. Tomorrow we go home to Bear Country. I miss my home and my friends. I miss my room in the admin hallway. I miss my life as tribe leader. I thought I needed a break from being tribe leader, from the responsiblity. So I went on a little vacation with some of my closest friends. The vacation didn’t turn out the way I thought it would. I was expecting two weeks of relaxation and a little time to be myself. No responsibilities, no worries, except for my responsibility to Aleece. Sometimes life gives you a little lesson. I have learned a great deal from this experience. I learned that I am stronger than I realized. I will no longer take my life for granted.

This morning at the parade grounds a ceremony was held formally making Yates the new General and tribe Leader of Fort Shasta. I think he will make a good leader. Even if he did read my journal without asking. I think that reading my story gave Yates a deep appreciation for who I am. Its funny but I usually keep my journal close to me. I don’t know why I left it on the table.

General Yates and his officers are going to discuss making Fort Shasta open to the public. This will help decrease the shortage of women. He is making purchasing wives from the slave traders illegal. I think this is a wise decision.

Hemy is out of jail and can’t wait to get back home to Matt. She didn’t have much of a honeymoon. This could explain her crankyness and irritability. Please note that she is the only one of us that ended up in jail.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 85

2005-01-26T07:20:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 85

Yates spent most of last evening at the jail discussing the trial with his sister. He left early this morning before I had the chance to talk to him. He left me a note and asked me to meet him at the building where the trial was going to be held. I dropped David and Aleece off at the preschool and then walked over to the trial building. Yates met me at the door. He looked worried and a bit frustrated. The first thing he said was that he was sorry. Playing dumb I said “About What?” He surprised me by saying “for bringing you here.” I thought he was going to mention my journal. “Does this mean I can go back home to Bear Country?” I was only kidding because I truly was expecting his answer to be NO. He surprised me again by saying that if I helped his sister get a fair trial he would let me and my friends go home, including Hemy. No pressure!!

A few hours later, Yates and I with several of the top officers from Fort Shasta entered the court room. General Scott began the trial by saying that a trial wasn’t necessary. His wife was obviously guilty and he was prepared to pass sentence. The crowd in the room suddenly got very noisy. Yates stood up and objected. He asked for General Scott to step down from the bench. General Scott refused. The other officers stood up and one at a time asked for General Scott to step down. The General said there wasn’t anyone else in the room qualified to be the judge. Yates said that I was qualified. I was a tribe leader and impartial to these hearings. The other officers agreed. General Scott stepped down and I stepped up. Ten officers took their places on the jury.

The trial only lasted a few hours. Witnesses from both sides had a chance to speak there minds, including the General. Yates’s sister never denied her guilt. The jurors left the room and came back within thirty minutes time with a verdict of guilty and a plan for restitution. The officers on the jury considered the crime of adultery a serious matter. They suggested that Yates’ sister spend the next year performing the dirty jobs that no one else wanted to do around Fort Shasta and that her marriage to General Scott be dissolved. It was also suggested that she apologize publicly. I agreed with the verdict and the suggested restitution.

General Scott disagreed with the outcome of the trial. He went ballistic and started ranting and raving about the scum of society. He said she was getting off easy. He wanted his wife dead. He said he didn’t want her hanging around undermining his authority. Yates asked General Scott to be quiet. He was making himself look bad. The General continued yelling and then dove at his wife and tried to strangle her.

General Scott was relieved of his duties as tribe leader of Fort Shasta by the other officers.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 84

2005-01-25T08:54:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 84

Yates took me to the jail to see Hemy. She was sitting on a bench, in a jail cell, dressed in a gray jumpsuit. I must have been an unexpected visitor because the moment I said “HI” she jumped up off the bench. I apologized for getting her in this mess. If I hadn’t invited her and Matt along on my get away to the lodge she would still be safe and sound at Central. Hemy said it wasn’t my fault that she was in jail. It was the creep of a new husbands fault. He should have taken her “No” seriously. We talked for a long time. I promised to help her get out of jail. I passed on the information that Yates gave me. He said that there would be a trial and that I could testify on her behalf. Hemy didn’t seem to be thrilled about going to trial. She doesn’t seem to think that she will be found innocent. I tried to calm her nerves by telling her not to worry. I wish I wasn’t worried.

Other news. Yates sister is in the cell next to Hemy. She is in jail because she was caught having an affair with a soldier. Her husband is General Scott, the tribe leader of Fort Shasta and the best friend of Yates. Yates and General Scott have been friends since they were both in diapers. Yates said that the affair his sister had with the other soldier has hurt his friendship with
General Scott. The two men are barely speaking to each other. Yates also said that the General is not in his right mind. He had the other soldier killed and would have had his sister killed too if he hadn’t intervened. A trial has been scheduled for tomorrow. The General plans to play judge. I don’t see how a fare trial could come from this.

I write a great deal of my life in my journals. I suppose if you wanted to know what kind of person I was, you would or could read my journal entries. I have never hidden my journal or locked it away from the eyes of others. It never occurred to me to do that. I was a little surprised when I woke up this morning to fine Yates reading the entries. I don’t think he knew I was standing there. I almost jumped out and scared him but decided not to. I quietly went back to bed so that he could finish reading my story. He knows a lot more about me now. I’m thinking this is probably a good thing. Yates, I hope you enjoyed my story. If you have any questions feel free to ask.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 83

2005-01-23T08:39:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 83

I should be thankful that I am in the situation I am in. I could have been sold to the scum of the earth. Yates for the most part has been a gentleman. He is a good father. He is second in command on this base and he looks good in a uniform. So far the only thing I can hold against him is that he bought me from a slave trader.

One of my friends has not been so lucky. Hemy is currently being held in custody for beating up her new husband. I guess he wasn’t a gentleman. Yates said she beat him up pretty badly. I’m not surprised. I asked if I could go and visit her. Yates said he would try and arrange for that to happen later today.

I met with Lisa, Emily and Kate at the preschool. It was good to see them. They are doing fine considering their circumstances. Lisa and Kate look a little depressed but Emily seems happy. I think she likes her new husband. I passed on the information about Hemy. We all had a good laugh and then the conversation turned serious. The topic of our conversation was mainly about Bear Country and getting home.

Bear Country does not compare to this base. They have things here that we could only dream about. If I wasn’t home sick and if I didn’t have responsibilities to Bear Country I could almost call this place home. I am making the best of my current situation but I need to go home. I want to go back to the life I was living. I want to see my friends, all of my friends. I continue to hope that Matt, Jonas, Pete, Joshua, Tony and Scat are all alive and well.

I am patiently waiting for Yates to return from his meeting with the Base Commander. He went there to discuss some issue about his sister. I am curious. What issue?

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 82

2005-01-22T02:54:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 82

Yates gave Aleece and I a tour of Fort Shasta. Fort Shasta was a secret military base back before the virus. Yates and several of the people that live on this base are the children of former soldiers that worked here. Yates’ father was a Colonel and a communications officer. This is a very clean, very well maintained base. The population is bigger than I imagined and it is true that there aren’t many women around. Yates said everyone here is expected to work. He said it would be a couple of days before he could find me a suitable occupation.

I will have more freedom than I expected. Yates said I can go anywhere I liked on the base but I would have to stay away from the areas that are marked for soldiers only. Unless of course I decided to enlist in the army then I would have access to some of the other places. Curiosity was killing me, with all this freedom what was keeping me here? I suppose I wasn’t surprised by the answer Yates gave me. He said there wasn’t anyplace to go. This is a secret military base. There is only one way in and one way out. The entrance is guarded by armed soldiers. He said I could try and go over the mountains but he wouldn’t recommend it. The mountains are extremely steep and there is an electric fence around the entire perimeter. He said if I managed to make it up the mountain and over the fence I would have to worry about wild animals. This area has mountain lions ,bears and other wild critters that would love to make a meal of me. I don’t even know which direction would lead me home to bear country.

The end of our tour ended at a very colorful building with ducks and rabbits and other cartoon characters painted on the sides. Before we walked inside Yates said he didn’t bring me here to Fort Shasta to be his sex slave. I breathed a sigh of relief. I spent all night thinking of excuses I could use to avoid sex. He said he brought me here to be a mom to his two year old son. His wife died last year from pneumonia. He said he loved his wife and didn’t expect me to fill her shoes. Yates sister was taking care of the boy but she is now unavailable. I was going to ask why she is unavailable but decided against it. Sometimes I think there is a higher power out there laughing at me trying to see how complicated he or she can make my life. I now have the responsibility of caring for two children that aren’t my own. Yates son David is adorable and he was so glad to see his Dad when we walked into the building.

The four of us walked back home.

I have not seen the other girls since my arrival. I am hoping their stay at Fort Shasta has been as pleasant as mine. Yates said he would locate their quarters for me so that I could visit my friends but he cautioned about breaking any rules or trying to escape.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 81

2005-01-20T03:29:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 81

It has been a long and interesting day. It was midday before our buyers appeared. I felt like a dog in the pound being looked over from every angle by a prospective owner. Luckily, we were all deemed acceptable. I only say the word “luckily” because if the guys are alive and if they are making plans to rescue us it would be better if we were all together in the same place.

We are all decent looking women and I have to admit that Lisa is cute. Two of the men that arrived to retrieve us wanted to take Lisa as their wife. There was a couple of minutes of “I saw her first” and “why do you get first choice” issues but they were solved with a round of rock, paper, scissors. I hate that game. If I had been Lisa I would have been very offended that the two men fighting over me didn’t participate in an actual dual to the death, with a knight in shining armour, and the victor gets the girl challenge. < ---That statement is actually kind of funny because Lisa's new husband is named "Victor."

I didn't get that kind of drama. I got "I'll take that one over there." There is something insulting about being chosen last even in a situation like this. If Yates had known I was about to cost him more than he had bargained for he would have chosen one of the other wives. My new husband didn't seem as excited about this whole "I'm getting a new wife thing" as the other men. My first thought was "great, I get the moody, cranky one."

I waited until we were paid for and released from cell before I pleaded and begged Yates to pay for Aleece. There was a brief moment when I thought I might not get her back. Mathias said he had already promised the Shakers that they could have Aleece but I think he was just trying to get Yates to pay more for her. A couple of tears and a please and Aleece was mine again. I cried more the moment she was handed back to me.

The trip to our new home lasted a couple of hours. I think we headed west but I'm not sure. We spent the entire time in the back of a truck with no windows. Our new home looks like a military installation surrounded by mountains on all sides. I'm thinking that there is only one way in and one way out. We must have passed thru a tunnel toward the end of our journey because there was several minutes of darkness and then it got light again. I want to go home but it is looking like escaping from here is going to be a difficult challenge.

Yates has actually been very kind. Our new home is small but comfortable.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 80

2005-01-18T08:28:00.000-08:00

Journal Entry 80- Podcast not available

It felt like we had been in this cell for days even though it had been only a few hours. We were all stressed and angry and tearful at times. We kept trying to reassure each other that our loved ones and friends weren’t dead. My head was full of possible scenerios of why we were captured. I kept trying to think positive thoughts but my mind kept wondering back to the awful possibility that our friends weren’t as lucky as we were. That they were dead back at the campsite. Then, suddenly I pictured Aleece in that cabin all alone. No one there to help her. I sat down and cried.

He wasn’t at all what I thought our captor would look like. I was expecting someone, big and ugly, with a nasty black smile. He wasn’t like that at all. He walked into the room nicely dressed, confident and handsome. He was holding a tray of food. The first thing he said was “Good morning ladies. My name is Mathias. Welcome to Alexandria City. Sorry about the accomodations.”

We started yelling at him all at once. Why are we here? Where are our friends? He told us to relax he could only answer us one at a time. He pointed to me so I asked my question. Where is Aleece? He looked a little confused. She’s a baby,Blond hair, wearing a pink dress.
Mathias looked at me with those big brown eyes and that shiny white smile. “Oh right, …I’m selling her to the Shakers. Don’t worry she is going to a wonderful tribe. They don’t believe in sex. Can’t have children of their own. So they buy orphans.”
I tried to reach thru the bars to ring his neck but my arms were too short. “She is not an orphan. She belongs to me.”
“Not any more. I’m getting a good price for her.” He assured me that Aleece would lead a wonderful life, have plenty of food, schooling and an excellent religious upbringing.
And then………and he said this with a smile, that we were being sold to a tribe that needed women. He said I would have plenty of opportunity to have more children.

Hemy went balistic then. She said it was illegal to buy and sell people and she said she already had a husband. Mathias played dumb. He said he didn’t know anything about Matt, Jonas, Tony, Pete, Joshua or Scat. He said he had advertised for women. Little Aleece was a bonus. Oh and he said that it wasn’t illegal to buy and sell people in Alexandria City. Apparently, the slave trade is alive and well is this part of the country.

I begged to see Aleece. I promised Mathias that I would do anything he asked. If I could just see her for a moment. He smiled that smile and said “NO” but he did say that if I could get my buyer to pay for Aleece I could have her back.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 79

2005-01-17T07:58:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 79

The unexpected sometimes happens. I woke with a tremendous headache. I hurt so bad sitting up was a challenge. Lisa, Hemy, Kate and Emily were lying in various position on the cell floor. There was a window in our cell. I couldn’t tell what time is was but the sun was just barely starting to rise. I crawled over to the girls and tried to get them to wake up. They responded in various ways. Emily must have been feeling as bad as I was because she puked all over the floor the moment she sat up. It was all I could do to not follow suit. My first verbal thought was “What the Hell happened?” Then there was a sudden panic when I realized that the guys and Aleece weren’t with us. I started yelling for anyone that was on the other side of the bars but know one came. I tried shaking the bars, and kicking the bars to get someones attention but the activity made my head hurt worse. I fell back down onto the floor. For a moment, I even considered that this whole thing was some awful nightmare brought on by bad fish eaten after the wedding ceremony. I knew I wasn’t dreaming when Lisa asked if she was.

The girls and I tried to piece together what happened. I vaguely remember being jolted awake by the feeling of being smothered. It was the same for Kate and Emily. Hemy said she and Matt were sleeping when several dark figures entered their room. She said she didn’t get a good look at anyone because before she could react someone was placing a rag on her mouth and nose.

We are stuck in this cell. I am hoping not for long. With any luck the guys will have been able to escape our attackers and they are at this moment planning our rescue.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 78

2005-01-17T01:37:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 78

I think the fresh air does something to people’s minds. I am not sure if it is clarity or insanity that moves in. Matt and Hemy have decided to marry. I am not surprised because they are always together and they spend every waking hour in each others arms. It must be an amazing feeling to be that in love. We don’t live under the same rules and restrictions that our parents lived under. A marriage certificate was required back then. A legal document signed. Today you can just make a verbal commitment to each other and continue on with life. There is something special about saying to someone “Will you spent the rest of your life with me?” We still hold ceremonies. Sometimes they are elaborate and sometimes they are simple.

We spent the day gathering flowers and decorating the campsite. A nice meal has been prepared. Hemy is pacing in the next room, rehearsing what she is going to say to Matt in her promise and Matt is next door probably doing the exact same thing. Keeping those two apart for a few hours was a challenge but we did it. I have written a wedding speech to the both of them. It’s kind of ironic because I have never been in love. (I think I know what love is). Shortly, the ceremony will start and Matt and Hemy will promise to love each other for ever.

The Speech:

When Matt and Hemy asked me to write this speech, my first response was NO. Get someone else to write it. I am not qualified. I did a little soul searching and I have experienced love and commitment. I think we all have. I loved my parents and to some degree I love all of my friends. Little Aleece shows me love everytime she blows one of those bubble rasberries. (It’s cute you should really see it.). We all have commitment to something. As the leader of Bear Country I have been charged with making sure that our tribe remains a viable and productive part of society. I have never experienced true romantic love or known the unspoken commitment that love of that magnitude brings. I was going to try and define love for everyone here today but “Love” is a personal thing between two people. Only Matt and Hemy can define their Love. I hope that the love that the two of you share lasts forever. Let this day, this ceremony, be a reminder of your commitment to love each other in good times and in bad. Matt and Hemy have written their own vows to each other and have asked us here today to witness this joyous occassion. (insert their vows here.)

I have written and rewritten. It’s not a long speech but I think it will be satisfactory.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 77

2005-01-15T07:29:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 77

When I was small my Dad introduced me to the pine cone people and their little villages. I think it was his way of keeping me occupied with something during those times when he and my mom were trying to recuperate from the days activities. It worked because I stayed busy. You can do a great deal with pine cones. They come in a variety of shapes and sizes. I made people and I built cities.

This morning after breakfast I was showing Scat and Aleece the pine cone people. Out of the blue Tony comes up behind me and kisses me on the cheek. I didn’t object to the kiss. It was just a little unexpected. I said “Good morning.” and then Tony said “Good morning.” I asked Tony if he had plans for the day. He said he was going to go exploring with Scat and asked me if I wanted to go along. I declined because the girls and I already made plans. That kiss on the cheek has been on my mind all day. It was probably one of those, life is good, I am having a good day kisses. One of those moments when you are just glad to be alive and you need to show it by kissing someone on the cheek. Anyone in the vicinity and I was that person. He probably would have kissed Lisa or Emily or Kate if they were sitting there.

The girls and I discussed kissing today. We discussed the different types of kisses and what those kisses mean in a particular stage of a relationship. Apparently, a kiss on the cheek is nothing to get excited about. If it’s nothing to get excited about how come it’s still on my mind?

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 76

2005-01-14T11:42:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 76

I think everyones gone to bed. Matt and Hemy disappeared early in the evening. The rest of us sat around the campfire and talked and laughed. It’s been a good day. It feels so good to not be the one making all the decisions. I laid in the sun. I went swimming in the lake. I collected pine cones. Don’t know why. It just seemed like the thing to do. Lots of girl talk. We all talked about the men in our lives. I learned some very interesting details. The guys actually came back with something to eat. Although, I doubt their story about the one that got away.

I think my parents would be proud that I haven’t given up on life. But it has been so hard. I try not to dwell on the bad things and I try to enjoy the good things. There have been good things. Lots of good things. This vacation is a good thing.

See you tomorrow

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 75

2005-01-12T11:39:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 75

I came to a sudden realization that afternoon at that abandoned building. The life I knew was gone. I wasn’t going to get it back. I cried when I saw that Hannah was dead. It was the last straw. I was not going to continue to live in fear. I had to change things. I thanked Matt and Jonas for saving me. They said they were just passing thru the area looking for stuff. I asked them if they belonged to a tribe and they said No in unison. It made me giggle because they answered alot of my questions in unison. Matt and Jonas helped me carry Hannah backed to the apartment and on the way I asked them to join my tribe. I gave them a long speech about how it was safer and that tribes could change the community for the better.

We buried Hannah that afternoon. It’s easier to dig a hole when you have help. It was a nice service. Sad but nice. Hannah was a good leader and I learned a great deal from her in the short couple of weeks that we knew each other. She had a confidence that I didn’t have, a strength to continue on with life. I think she gave part of that to me.

Deciding on a name for our tribe was not an easy task. We, all of us living in the apartment thought of tribe names for several days and then we held a meeting. I can’t remember all of the tribe names mentioned but most of them were pretty bad. Lets see, The Chieftans, Gators, Blue Jays, Robins, Kawasakis, racoons, badgers, trojans and the list went on and on. We finally decided to just refer to our selves as Highland Heights because this was the name of the gated community that we lived in.

Life was getting good. We all worked as a team and we spread the word in the community that tribes could help tribes rebuild our city. Then the fire happened. Someone tried to build a fire in an apartment across the way from ours. We could see it thru the windows. It didn’t take long for the fire to get out of hand. The apartment complexes including ours burned to the ground. We were all homeless. I went to Bear Country High school on Lafayette Blvd. It was just down the road. We decided to break into there and stay for a few days until we could find a new place to live. We never left.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 74

2005-01-11T06:18:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 74

It wasn’t long before I ran out of food in my house. I spent the next days going from house to house scavaging for food. Most of the homes in my neighborhood were empty. The families that lived there left trying to escape the disease. I became really good at breaking into homes. My problem was that other children were also breaking into homes looking for food. It didn’t take long before everyhouse in my neighborhood had been broken into and picked clean. Sometimes I went days without anything to eat.

My first friend was Hannah. I met her one day while in town. I was looking for food and trying my best to stay away from the Hyenas. They were a particulary brutal tribe. Rape seemed to be one of their favorite activities. I made a wrong turn and ended up in an alley with only one exit and the Hyenas were close behind. I ducked behind a pile of crates and boxes. I was trying to be quiet and wishing, hoping the Hyenas were far enough behind me that they didn’t see me go into the alley. Someone grabed me from behind. I almost had a heart attack. It was Hannah. She told me to be quiet. We slid into a cellar. I believe she saved my life that day.

For the next few weeks we hung together. Hannah and I had a lot in common. We were both only children, liked the same music and watched the same TV shows. Both of our parents had jobs that kept them in the area during the virus. Hannah lived in a gated community in an apartment with several other children. They helped each other survive. This is where I met Pete and Lisa.

One day Hannah and I were out looking for food. We were talking and laughing and not paying attention to what was going on around us. We ran into the Hyenas. It was to late to run. The Hyenas tied us up and dragged us into an abandoned building on Chase street. Hannah was dragged into a back room. I could hear her crying and begging them to stop. I struggled to get free but I couldn’t. Hannah finally stopped crying and the Hyenas came out for me. I was terrified. This was it. I was finally going to die. That’s when Jonas and Matt showed up. My heros. They beat the Hyenas to a pulp and left a bloody mass of broken bodies on the floor. Hannah died that day. We couldn’t save her. What a waste.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 73

2005-01-10T06:57:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 73

It has been a good morning. The cabins by the lake are in much better shape than the lodge. No broken windows or doors off their hinges. I spent the morning doing a little light cleaning and gathering wood. I even found some delicous berries while exploring. The girls and I have been sun bathing most of the morning. Aleece and Lost are also enjoying the great outdoors. Lost is having a good time. The little four legged critter hasn’t stopped running around since we got here. She is absolutely certain that she is going to catch one of those squirrels. We are waiting for the guys to return from their little hunting expedition. I think it’s male bonding because we have food. The girls and I have decided that we would give them until noon to return and then we are going to break into the stores and eat what we brought from Bear country.

Yesterday evening at the lodge brought back memories from the past. Those were sad and horrible times. I have tried hard not to dwell on what happened back then. But unfortunately it is impossible to erase certain memories from your mind. I was crushed and broken when my parents died. For a few days I wanted to die. My heart hurt so badly. I remember lying on my bed and praying that I would go to sleep and not wake up. My parents were both dead in the other room. I didn’t deserve this. How could this horrible thing have happened? I am not sure when I chose to live and continue with life. I think it was when I decided to bury my parents in the back yard.

It was a challenge to get my parents out of their room and into the back yard. I struggled most of the day. My dad was very big and dead bodies are so very heavy. My mom was a little easier but it was still a challenge. I am a little amazed that I was able to get them out of the house at all. I drew lines in the dirt to mark the area where I was going to dig. The movies always made digging holes tedious but easily done. Digging holes big enough to bury someone is almost impossible. I dug until my hands had blisters as big as quarters. The hole still wasn’t nearly big enough and the ground was getting too hard for me to dig thru. I laid down and cried. I was tired and I was hungry. I had taken on an impossible task. I was defeated I couldn’t do it. I placed a couple of blankets over my parents and put bricks my father had stored in the shed around the edge. I wanted, I needed a whole to put them in. Its what you do when your love ones die. I wanted to bury them and say a prayer. I saw it happen in the movies a hundred times. I went back in my house and opened one of the last cans of vegetables that was in the pantry.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 72

2005-01-08T11:10:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 72

It took us a little longer to get started on our little journey than we expected. The wait for the truck took for ever. When the truck arrived it was huge. I was expecting a normal pick up truck. The truck the Tony, Pete and Jonas brought back to Bear Country was military issue. I didn’t even know there was a truck like that in Bear country.

We loaded up our gear and supplies. It amazes me what people think they need to bring on a vacation.

The journey wasn’t too bad once we actually got started. A few hands of rock , paper, scissors and the driver was chosen. There was no traffic. Not surprising because most kids don’t drive. There were a few people walking along the way, a cow in the road, and several stray dogs.. Tony hit a big pot hole in the road and those of us in the back went flying. He said he didn’t see the hole until it was too late. Jonas took over driving after that.

We arrived at the lodge just as it was starting to get dark. We all decided that it would probably be a good idea if we all stayed in the big house until the morning. Tomorrow we would check out the cabins near the lake. Everyone started to unload the truck. Emily took Aleece and Scat into the lodge to scope out the rooms. We were expecting the inside to be a mess. Some of the windows were broken out and the front door was off its hinges. The lodge was probably home to an assortment of animals and little critters. We heard Emily scream. We dropped everything and went to help expecting to find an angry racoon, a snake or a large angry spider.

The past came rushing back as soon as we entered the room at the top of the stairs. Emily was standing there frozen, crying.

We don’t know when she died. She probably came here to the lodge to escape the disease. She was lying on the bed and next to the bed was the portable crib. The baby, a little girl was sitting leaning against the bars. She was wearing My Little Pony pajamas. No one said anything but we all knew because we had seen this sort of thing before that the baby died sometime after her mom. There was no one here to save her. Her last days were misery. You can only imagine how she must have cried for her mom empty bottle in hand. Her mom must have thought they would be safe here, away from people, away from the disease.

It felt as if we stood there forever. I was resisting the urge to cry and then suddenly I needed to know what their names were. I started going thru the drawers looking for identification. Tony made me stop. He pushed me and the others out of the room. He closed the door and tied a piece of fabric around the handle. It’s what we used to do to let others know that death was behind a door. There were so many dead that we couldn’t bury them all. A few of us tried but the task was too big. It was easier to tie a piece of cloth around the door handle.

We all walked back down stairs to the lobby. Our little two week vacations has started with sadness. I think we all thought of going back home but what would be the point. We can’t change what happened in the past. Jonas was the first person to speak. It was funny in a morbid kind of way. When he said “I guess we wont be staying in that room tonight.”

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 71

2005-01-07T09:49:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 71

Just east of Bear Country is Brighten’s Mountain and on that mountain is an old resort my family used to visit when I was a child. It used to be a pretty popular place especially in the winter when it snowed. I remember having so much fun up there. In the summer my parents would rent one of the cabins and we would stay for a week and go fishing. My Dad spent his time baiting the hooks and trying to keep me from falling off the edge into the water. I miss those times.

Tony, Pete and Jonas are currently out getting a truck and enough gas to get us there and back. I’m almost finished with my packing. I left a message with a couple of people and on the bulletin board for Casey incase she returns before we get back. Bear Country will be in good hands.

In a couple of hours I leave my worries behind for two weeks. I won’t be alone. The list of people going on this little vacation includes: Me, Aleece, Tony, Scat, Pete, Jonas, Lisa, Matt, Hemy, Joshua, his sister Kate and Emily.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 70

2005-01-06T06:33:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 70

Tony dropped by to see me. He stood in my doorway for a few moments. I was sitting in the rocker playing with Aleece. Sort of ignoring that he was standing there. I think I was waiting for Tony to say something first. He finally said something like “So how are things going today?” I did the eye roll thing and said “Life is fine.” I don’t think he believed me. I’m not sure I believe me. I continued to play with Aleece, hoping he would just go away. Tony came all the way in my room. He sat on the couch. I did more eye rolling. “What do you want?” I asked. Tony innocently said he wanted nothing. He just wanted to know if Aleece and I wanted to go to the park for lunch. I calmly said that the park was still too wet from the storm. He had an alternative plan. He invited us to the Arcade. I tried to say no but he insisted. I bundled up Aleece and we went to the Arcade.

The arcade was fun. Hyatt was as polite and nice as he was the last time we stepped into his establishment. I was glad to see that his business wasn’t hurt by the storm. I spent the next few hours trying to avoid a serious conversation with Tony. I know he wanted to talk to me about recent events. I did everything I could to avoid discussing the issues. Tony finally got tired of chasing me around. He cornered me and drug me outside to a bench.

The first thing I said was that I didn’t think Casey was coming back. The responsbility was overwhelming me. Tony said it was OK. He’d help. He said Casey would be back. I am not sure if he really believed that or if he was just trying to make me feel better. Our conversation continued about a lot of other things. We even discussed my role as Tribe leader. I have been tribe leader from the beginning but lately I have wondered if maybe I should step down and let someone else take over. Tony listened carefully to everything I had to say and he was very sympathetic. I cried all over his shirt. Only good friends let you do that. Our conversation ended when I heard Aleece crying inside of the Arcade. Hyatt was doing his best to calm her down. She was just hungry.

The walk home was a quiet one but I felt better. Tony said he would watch over Aleece for the rest of the evening and give her back to me in the morning. I didn’t object.

Madie

MLBC: Journal Entry 69

2005-01-05T09:26:00.000-08:00

Podcast Journal Entry 69

I haven't seen this journal in two days. The rain stopped and the other gangs went home. The storm caused a lot of damage around Bear Country. The wind blew trees over. Several buildings are missing their roofs. Our school favored very well except for the water that came in thru the front doors. Matt and Hemy said their school building also survived the storm with minimal damage. People have gone back to doing whatever it is they normally do.

I had a scare today. I lay down to take a nap while Aleece was napping. When I woke up, she wasn't in her cradle. It was a little unnerving until I realized that Lisa or Emily probably had her. I went to get a drink and ran into Lisa. I asked her if she had Aleece. She said no. Ok, Emily probably has her. I looked everywhere for Emily. No one had seen her or Aleece. My heart began to race. They weren't inside Bear Country. I went to the plaza. Maybe Emily took Aleece on a walk. I couldn't find her at the plaza and no one there claimed to have seen her either. I went to the park, no Emily or Aleece. I ran back to Bear Country. The first person I saw was Pete. I was in a panic. I said that Emily and Aleece are missing. He probably thought I was insane. That’s when Emily walked up behind me with Aleece in her arms. I lost control and started yelling at her for taking Aleece without my permission. I said many other things I wish I could take back as well. I snatched Aleece back and went to my room. I've been here all afternoon. I hope Casey comes back soon. Motherhood is warping my brain.